Monday, March 25, 2013

Archer - Yes, Boom! Bumper.

Archer "Live and Let Dine" (S04E07):
From the Diary of Archer Sterling...

Stuck doing security for the Bastard Chef (no really, that's his name), at least I'm the sous chef... and it's being filmed! 2.8 million viewers, and they get to watch me save the day. Bastard guy kept getting really mad when I let the slippery bowls be really slippery and Lana just can not hostess. But in all fairness, the bastard guy did make her turn down every single person who called. The best part: Mother couldn't get a table! Oh yeah, and something about ISIS impressing the state department for work, maybe.

So bastard guy (BG from here on on) chucks food at Cyril while I explain how Ray is a 'child-murdered' to the TV people. I did kind of like BG's 'bumper' tagline though. Also, Cyril was required to call me chef as I ABBAD - always be berating and belittling. Lana still can't answer the phone, but it's fine because it was Cheryl trying for Mother's reservation.

Cyril refuses to make melon sheep eyes as I made melon balls. BG compliments my cooking as Mother sits drinking with Pam's fish without a reservation. Cheryl and Pam head to the ammo nanny to trade a handjob for looking for the top secret number to BG's phone. Surprisingly, it worked.
FX Network
Ray screws up serving the Albanian ambassador and Lana finally understands Mother's plan of calling in the anonymous threat out in the open, so all the ISIS members stop working and start drinking, except me! Unfortunately, BG poisons the ambassador with a glass of wine and then gets away. So ISIS looks stupid, but I'm still an awesome chef. Oh, it was Barry who embarrassed us.
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