Teen Mom 3: Arabella's Birthday, Briana's Date, Unseen Moments

So, after the season is just about over, I've got to say that these girls, collectively, are the least interesting teens that this show has followed to date. Yes, it's nice not to have arrests, addiction, and rehab all over the screen, but the lives they're living just aren't intriguing. Nobody is really struggling with school, only two of the girls are balancing work, nobody is planning a wedding, and there are no health issues with any of the kids. I'm calling it a snooze-fest and probably won't even take the time to cover the finale and the inevitable Dr. Drew follow-up episodes. I think America might be done with teen motherhood on camera for a while.

Teen Mom 3 "Taking Chances" (S01E12): Arabella's birthday is July 18th, but otherwise there are no time markers.

Alex: Arabella turns 1, and has a cupcake-themed party. Alex invites her dad, who lives far away and is still upset that Alex got pregnant so young. [how long can you really hold that against someone?] Matt is MIA since got kicked out of the halfway house. 

MTV

Katie: She hands off Molli to Joey, but when he doesn't want to plan a breastfeeding session the next day, both Katie and Molli get upset. [I hope that incident taught Joey that Molli isn't weaned!] Joey's new girlfriend, Brigette, and her daughter, Kynlee, meet them at a mudding event, where Joey is going to race an ATV. Katie goes to a party, but misses Molli. [I don't think her hair change was as drastic as she was hoping for.]

Mackenzie: Her parents are afraid to put a foot down on Mackenzie's antics because they don't want to lose contact with Gannon. [eye roll. they know their daughter couldn't make it without them.] After talking with her mother, Mackenzie decides to try getting Josh to spend more time with her family. Apparently, jet-skiing is the way to get Josh to hang out.

Briana: She stays in contact with Jacob, against her mother's wishes. She even asks a friend to take her to meet him for ice cream. [that place - Abracadabra - looks good!] They're going to keep sneaking around, though Briana doesn't like that term. [what other word would she use? it definitely describes the situation!] Then, they go mini-golfing, and Briana thinks about how she'll ever get a solo date with Jacob. [ha!] Soon, though, she realizes via twitter that Jacob is talking to another girl. [this girl spends a lot of time on twitter!] She decides to block his number. [so... Mom was right? LoL.]

Teen Mom 3 "Unseen Moments" (Special):
Alex: She illustrates for her sister how gross changing diapers in public restrooms can be. [did they have nothing else to show here?] They show Alex's solo from a dance competition, where she wasn't as fit and technical as she used to be.
 
Katie: Katie and Joey once went bowling and talked about going to the courthouse to marry the next day. [glad THAT didn't happen!] She tries to make her own baby food, but blending bananas and apples and putting it in a bottle doesn't work. Joey is shown not caring much about school, not just for him, but for anyone. [explains why he doesn't think Katie needs a degree.] Katie's sister, Blake, advises her to be single for a while. We see Joey and Brigette agree to start a relationship.

Mackenzie: She tries to baby-proof the house. Josh talks about maybe wearing a helmet because of all his concussions, but isn't serious. [Mackenzie didn't know what "bull semen" was. cue the ditzy jokes.] While on her break from Josh, Mackenzie tells her friends that she'd date someone else if the right guy came along. [well, yeah.] When her mother was out of town, she had friends come over, whom she pelted with water balloons. Then, they go decorate people's cars. [I guess that's fun in Oklahoma.]

Briana: She takes some of Nova's things to a consignment shop of sorts. She fails her final but is able to re-take it. [re-take a final exam?? I definitely don't support that!] She gets a tattoo of a quote on her side. [I wonder why this didn't make it into a real episode...?]