News Roundup: Late May

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Renewals, Cancellations, & Scheduling:
Oxygen has renewed Best Ink for a second season.

Disney XD has ordered a second season of Lab Rats. [haven't heard of the show? don't worry; most people haven't heard of the channel.]

Rules of Engagement, believe it or not, was renewed by CBS for a 13-episode seventh season. Look for it mid-season.

TruTV has renewed South Beach Tow for a second season.

Rather than canceling LA Complex completely, the CW has decided to air 13 new episodes over the summer, beginning in July.

Just when we thought that Pan Am was off the air, it seems that Amazon might actually pick them up again. We previously mentioned that Amazon is looking to do original sitcoms and children's programming, but I guess dramas are in their minds as well.

MTV has canceled I Just Want My Pants Back.

A&E has canceled Breakout Kings. They've also canceled Dog the Bounty Hunter. [I'm glad. Every time I hear about that show I flash back to this horrible car trip I took four or five years ago where the girl sitting next to me wouldn't shut up about that show for over an hour!]

SyFy has canceled Sanctuary.

Cake Boss is back on TLC this Monday, May 28th at 9pm ET/PT.

The National Championships of the History Bee will be televised on Friday, June 1st at 8pm on History. Al Roker will be the moderator to the 32 regional competitors.

Over on CMT, Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Brides premieres Friday, June 2nd at 8pm ET/PT.

History has renewed Ice Road Truckers, with the new season beginning Sunday, June 3rd, 9pm ET/PT.

Also on Sunday, June 3rd, at have Fast Food Mania premiering at 10pm ET/PT on Discovery.

Dance Moms will return on Tuesday, June 5th at 9pm ET/PT.

Flying Wild Alaska returns to Discovery on Friday, June 8th at 10pm ET/PT.

Redneck Island, Steve Austin's reality competition series, begins Saturday, June 9th at 10pm ET/PT on CMT.

True Blood's fifth season on HBO begins Sunday, June 10th at 9pm ET/PT.

Sunday, June 17th at 9pm ET/PT is the premiere of Forensic Firsts on the Smithsonian Channel.

Disney XD's Pair of Kings will begins its third season on Monday, June 18th at 8:30pm ET/PT.

Baby Daddy, ABCFamily's new comedy, begins Wednesday, June 20th at 8:30pm ET/PT.

The Soul Man, Cedric "The Entertainer"'s new show, begins Wednesday, June 20th at 10pm ET/PT.

The Exes is returning to TVLand on Wednesday, June 20th at 10:30pm ET/PT.

Lifetime's Army Wives continues on Sunday, June 24th at 10pm ET/PT.

TVLand's Retired at 35 will return on Tuesday, June 26th at 10pm ET/PT. [yeah, I forgot that this show was still going, too.]

Disney's Gravity Falls will begin Friday, June 29th at 9:30pm ET/PT, though there will be a special preview on Friday, June 15th at 9:55pm ET/PT.

Islamic Art: Mirror of the Invisible World premieres July 6th at 9pm ET/PT on PBS.

Breaking Bad will return to AMC Sunday, July 15th at 10pm ET/PT.

AMC's Small Town Security will debut Sunday, July 15th at 10pm ET/PT.

AMC's Hell on Wheels returns Sunday, August 12th at 9pm ET/PT.

SyFy's Haven will begin its third season on Friday, September 21st at 10pm ET/PT.

Cast & Plot Updates:
Britney Spears may appear in a fall episode of Glee to be a tribute to the pop star.

After recent allegations that Raven-Symone is gay, the actress tweeted in response that it's her right to be straight or gay and to disclose whatever she wants.

Remy Gonzalez (ex-husband of Buddy's sister Lisa on Cake Boss), has been sentenced to nine years in prison for sexually assaulting a 13-year-old girl.

Amber Portwood, of 16 & Pregnant and Teen Mom, is probably going to prison for five years, as she just can't keep it together trying to complete a drug court program.

JoAnna Garcia will be the new lead on Animal Practice on NBC in the fall.

Season 2 of American Horror Story will be set in the sixties.

Shows in Development & Other Fun Stuff:
ABC is still developing a new Hulk television show, possibly for the 2013-2014 season.

YouTube's latest original content channel is HUNGRY, which goes live on July 2nd. It will feature 60-180-second how-to videos, celebrity-driven food videos, with new episodes being posted weekly. Longer format videos may come later.

Did you know that the slow-motion running on Baywatch stemmed from a lack of funding that caused them to have to fill the time slot?

Now that House is finished, Jesse Spencer (Dr. Chase) has admitted to taking his pen and his badge from the set.

Eugene J. Polley, inventor of the television remote control (in 1955), has passed away.  

Hulu has a bunch of original series coming up. Spoilers begins June 4th. Up to Speed and We Got Next begin in August.

"Cable TV Channels and Their Shows"

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Confession time... I've read every strip of PhD (Piled Higher and Deeper) Comics. I found many of their jokes to be amusing when I was in graduate school, and they continue to amuse me on a regular basis. Well, back in November, they published a strip called "'Science' Programming," which looked at some "cable TV channels and their shows." I found it to be pretty funny at the time, and I'm reminded of it as we move into Upfronts Season, so I thought I'd share. You can find the strip below, originally published here.

Many of Discovery Communications' channels have misleading names at this point (though at least they've stopped pretending that TLC is "The Learning Channel"), and PhD is not the first comic to poke fun at this fact. They generally ballpark their figures and broadly describe their categories, but some of the fact are still dead-on. I decided to investigate the panel's assertions a little, and below you'll see my findings.

Science does have Monster Bug Wars, Killer Robots, and Build it Bigger, but that's not really a quarter of their programming. I actually am surprised that they didn't include "aliens" or "bugs," as those seem to be hot Science topics. Whether their shows "about science," "not about science" or "about engineering" match up to the chart is a bit more difficult to judge, as the line between science and engineering is fine, plus they have no definitive explanation of what the network considers "science." The "projectiles" and "junk" though? Absolutely! Between their rocketry programming, Flying Anvils, JUNKies, and reruns of Junkyard Wars, they've got that area covered.

Looking at Discovery, I have to ask... besides MythBusters, what shows are they airing that "debunk myths"? Sure, the show has 200 episodes under its belt, and it seems as if it's always on, but that only indicates the network's allotment of airtime to that show, not their allotment of how many different shows. I guess Discovery has specials from time to time that explain some things (like Secrets of the FBI), but that's not regular programming. Moving on, I disagree that shows about "guns," "Alaska," and programs with "wild" or "dirty" in the title have equal footing on the network. Besides American Guns and Sons of Guns, what else focuses on weapons? Plus, I can only think of two shows each for "wild" and "dirty" (Dirty Jobs, Dirty Money, Man vs. Wild, and Man, Woman, Wild). Alaska, however, it a mogul for the network. I don't know how that trend got started, but at least five shows center on our largest state: Bering Sea Gold, Deadliest Catch, Flying Wild Alaska, Gold Rush, and Alaska, the Last Frontier. The biggest surprise for me was examining the "cars, motorcycles, and tornadoes" section. Including tornadoes really only adds Storm Chasers, but there really are quite a few programs about the vehicles that I didn't think about: American Chopper, American Hot Rod, Carfellas, Biker Build-Off, Monster Garage, and even Cash Cab if you want to stretch it a bit.

I don't really understand how PhD decided to depict National Geographic's programming. When's the last time you saw a show about dinosaurs? A few "state troopers and/or guns" shows are out there on reality television, but the only ones I could find that run on NatGeo are Alaska State Troopers and Perfect Weapon... certainly not 42% of their broadcasts. The rest of their rundown fits a little better, with Islands, Wild Russia, and Word Travels for geography, and Dangerous Encounters, Don't Tell my Mother, The Indestructibles, and World's Toughest Fixes for "shows about grown men doing stupid things." I definitely would have given "debunking myths" a larger proportion, though. If you look at this theme in the broadest sense, NatGeo is always running hour-long specials that explain one thing or another, like the birth of Christ, the likelihood of Armageddon, and how the drug-running industry works. They also have I Didn't Know That, Taboo, and Is It Real? as a few shows which serve primarily to explain things to audiences. Personally, I would've made "shows about animals" a category and allotted it a quarter of the pie... the same with "shows about weather or storm phenomena." And maybe even a "shows about prisons" section, for things like Lockdown, Locked Up Abroad, Inside Death Row, and Breakout. Kinda crazy how many programs they have about jail, huh?

Last, we have History, the biggest joke in the panel. If they had left off "that takes place on a boat/truck," I might have considered "shows about a deadly profession" more seriously. But, they limited Ax Men and Full Metal Jousting, leaving us with Ice Road Truckers and Ice Road Truckers: Deadliest Roads, the short-lived Harvest, and Swamp People. Are Mudcats or Madhouse all that dangerous? Either way, that slice should really be a little more equal to the size of "junk," which includes American Pickers, Cajun Pawn Stars, Pawn Stars, and maybe Real Deal. Oh, and that whole "shows about hairy bikers" section? Just a cheap shot at Hairy Bikers, a twelve-episode series that aired last fall, following two motorcyclists as they rode across America, enjoying regional food along the way.

It's amusing to think about how little bits of commentary here and there sometimes cause us to research the validity of various arguments. It certainly pushes one's curiosity, though! My final thoughts on the matter? When you look at the number of reality television shows on all networks (setting aside the true biographies and non-fiction specials for a moment), there really are more programs about Alaska, junk, and dangerous stunts (professional or otherwise) than we need. Probably weddings and desserts, too. Agree?