by Amy K. Bredemeyer
Last year's "Treehouse of Horror" was better, guys. There were hilarious board game spoofs, tv and movie spoofs (The Office and Jumanji), but it did reference that horrific Twilight stuff. The year before's was (remember werewolf Harry Potter?) okay... but this year's beats that one. We got four segments this year, and it was clear that the final one was to be the big deal. Well, Avatar is too old now, so I didn't think it made for a great parody. Plus, the blatant sexual dialogue in it was inappropriate for the show. However, the short 127 Hours spoof was amusing, and the middle two scenarios were worth watching, so that makes me happy.
Simpsons "Treehouse of Horror XXII" (S23E03): The kids come home and talk about their massive haul from trick-or-treating. They don't get to enjoy much, though, as Marge, as the SwitchWitch, swaps out the goodies for dental supplies. [wow... that sucks.] But no before Maggie can gulp down some red hots. [whoa. so rarely do you see ANYONE who likes those... much less young kids!] The next day, Homer brings the candy out of the house to send to the troops, but drives past the USO HQ and heads to "Candy Eating Peak" with it but falls into a canyon... where we have a 127 Hours reference. But, Homer can't wait the 20 measly minutes and goes ahead and bites his arm off... the wrong arm first! [ridiculous. and dumb. it would take longer than 20 minutes to get through an arm!] But, when he's finally able to dig into the bag, he finds that it's filled with vegetables... courtesy of Bart, Lisa, and Maggie. [hahaha. I actually thought this was downright hilarious.]
Scene II: "The Diving Bell and the Butterball" Homer was bitten by spider while decorating for Halloween. Wouldn't have been a big deal normally, but this spider was venomous and caused Homer to become paralyzed. Marge dresses him, though he's tied to a dolly so they can move him around. Lisa reads to him, but that doesn't last... she figures out that Homer can fart at will, as a method of communication. [this is gonna get gross...] Lisa starts saying the alphabet and Homer farts when she should write down a letter... eventually he composes a letter to Marge as well as a book. A second spider bites him and he turns into a paralyzed SpiderMan... still tied to a dolly. [and it looks as crazy as it sounds.] The end of this segment has a reference to the actors of SpiderMan the musical being in a retirement home. [it probably would've been funnier if South Park didn't make fun of that musical just last week.]
Scene III: Dial D for Diddily Apparently Springfield is getting worse... as Ned is driving in his car, he passes the Yale School of Prostituion and a Hot Dog Maker. [haha] Ned kills the mayor... then Burns. [so anyone who is doing evil... got it.] And Sideshow Bob. After some more Dexter references, he takes down an art thief. Ned is getting instructions "from God" on who to kill to make the world a better place." But, when he hears that he needs to take out Selma and Patty, he gets suspicious. As one might have guessed, it's Homer messing with Flanders. [loved the roadrunner reference!] Homer is having Ned kill anyone who wrongs Homer in any way... luckily it doesn't take Ned too long to figure it out, and he is understandably really upset. Then, God reaches into Homer's house and strangles him. [unexpected...] But, God blames everything on Ned when Satan shows up... with Maude as his plaything. [creepy and inappropriate ending, IMO.]
Scene IV: In the Na'vi Bart is transformed into an alien avatar of sorts, and almost immediately confronted by the avatar-alien bullies. He tries to bond with with a dragon but it is slow going. Milhouse tries to suggest that since it's a Japanese dragon, he needs a converter... but that doesn't work, either. [made me chuckle, tho!] Bart is eaten by a banana, but another alien saves him. He talks to her (almost letting the truth slip) and she kisses him. The next day, it appears that she is with child... Bart thought she was on birth control, but apparently that just stops the offspring from being born while they were having sex. [holy crap. this show still airs at 8pm... TONS OF KIDS ARE UP and don't need to hear about sex and birth control! grrrr....] There are, apparently, a million fetuses. [...say what??] Bart has to go find a secretion to calm his baby-mama, but it turns out to be polarium, the substance he's been sent there to find. Milhouse calls for backup and Bart is upset that his friend has betrayed the planet where he got laid. [half-funny and half-horrid. "got laid," too? I mean, I know the Treehouse episodes are non-canonical, but isn't Bart still just 10??] The backup arrives with militia but the Na'vi have elephant tanks, anteaters were flamethrowers, giant rabbits who stomp, pteradactyls that lay piranhas, cyclops scorpions, and monkeys that bite off squirrel heads and use them as grenades. [cool jungle weaponry, I thought.] Bart admits to the girl that he's been a double agent but now he's on her side... and she tells him that she has space warts... that she got from Milhouse. [guys, this is beyond ridiculous. It's appalling. seriously. Simpsons shouldn't try to be South Park...]
The episode had a pretty funny ending, all in all. Lisa comes out and tells everyone to start Christmas shopping. You know, since it's now November... but, don't make homemade gifts... knitting a sweater prevents 27 jobs. [... kinda.]
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