Suburgatory: Tessa Gets a Job & Some Wheels!

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

The idea that your teenager needs to get a job in order to afford a car is pretty standard on television. But the idea that they express the desire, get the job, save the money, and acquire the vehicle in a single episode doesn't happen as often. It was believable only because Dallas paid Tessa so much up front, and the vehicle was a used and possibly-damaged scooter from Craigslist. But that's not even the roughest part of the episode to believe... Dallas only having a few sorority sisters? I have a hard time believing that... and that she was in a multicultural sorority... she strikes me more as a Panhellenic girl. And why would an unwanted girl show up and go through that whole charade? I dunno... maybe I just don't get mean girls?

Suburgatory "Independence Day" (S01E17): Dallas decides to invite her sorority sisters to her shoppe's opening, and they're going to sleep on the living room floor, like old times. [first, what was with the crystal Joy Behar bust? Second, I hardly want to sleep on the floor anymore and I'm at least ten years younger than Dallas... what is she thinking??] When they arrive, she shares about her divorce... only to be interrupted with Dallas' rival, Tulsa, shows up uninvited. [can we agree that the name is fabulous??] Tulsa was widowed five years ago so she believes that she "trumps" Dallas. The two become even less cordial when Tulsa announced her plans to make a move on George.[what does everyone see in this guy??]

George is realllllly late picking up Tessa at school, where she sat alone because he doesn't want her walking home at night. [she has a cell phone, right? couldn't she have called Noah or Dallas or Sheila?] Tessa wants her own wheels, and George says that she needs to buy them herself. [typical.] She decides to act upon her independence by making her own dinner. [...it's a start! and, "a dictator would not use America" was funny. I also have never melted the butter, then put the bread in the pan... I butter the bread to make a grilled cheese!] She also asks Dallas about working in her store. [smart. use your connections!] Dallas starts her with a pile of money for an advance, a signing bonus, and a manicure to look better when she shows jewelry and whatnot. [...of course. why would I have expected anything less?] Tessa and Lisa go to buy a scooter from Craigslist, but it doesn't have gas so they have to walk it back. [yeah, only a youngster would think you could just buy it and ride it home... it's not a toy...]

ABC/RICHARD CARTWRIGHT

Noah tells George to talk to Tessa's teachers to see if she's okay, so he heads to the guidance counselor's office. While he's at the school, he sees a poem Tessa wrote. George thinks that Tessa is upset about her mother, so George goes to see his ex's mother to ask how he might get in touch with Alex. [it's rather clear they have no contact whatsoever, eh?] 

George goes looking for Tessa and Malik reveals that she's in East Chatswin. [I should have suspected he'd say something!] Dallas leaves her opening to help George. [hmmm... love it and find it incredibly strange, all at the same time.] When George confronts Tessa about her poem, she says that she never thinks about her mother. [which, apparently, some folks on the internet find difficult to believe. I have to side with Tessa, though, as I think about my father maybe four times a year, and he left when I was eleven.]

Other things going on? Dalia comes home to find a motorcycle and matching jacket from her father. She then asks her dad for a monkey. [spoiled.brat.]