Suburgatory: Internships, Camps, Babies, Pets

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I have had a lot of toaster strudel in my day, guys. But I've never seen gigantic icing packets like that... what's deal?? that's actually one of my smallest complaints, though. I'm super-close to pulling the trigger and not covering this show after the season finale. I like the way George interacts with people, but I don't like him as a character. I never warmed up to Dallas and Dalia the way that others did, and I can't stand Sheila. I don't see George and Eden lasting that long, and the "Malisa" thing has just gotta go. Not to mention, I've complained about the show throwing away its premise many times. In this episode, Tessa has the chance to go back to Manhattan for an internship, and George won't hear of it. He does not give a single reason why, which signifies, to me, that the character doesn't remember why he left NYC to begin with. I'm just sitting here shaking my head at what could have happened instead...

Suburgatory "The Great Compromise" (S01E21): [what in the WORLD was with Eden's "chia seeds voice" ????] Eden has started to take George's side on household issues, forcing Tessa to question if the temporary roomie truly gets a vote. [seriously!] In complaining to Lisa, Tessa decides to seek out an internship, and wants to apply to The Village Voice. [are internships for high school students a new thing? I went to a prep school and can't recall any classmates doing such things in the summers.] Eden finds out when she sees the printer running, [oh yeah, sidenote, Eden is worried about the future fertility of the fetus so she's banned wireless internet in the house!] and surprisingly sides with Tessa on the issue, even offering to talk to George... which only leads to more household confusion. [and yet, they still didn't manage to really lure me to one side or the other.] Tessa returns from delivering her application in-person to a fight where the best compromise would be for the sixteen-year-old to commute daily. [I don't even know where to start. I did like her "if he looks at it, he's interested" line, though.]

Lisa, by the way, gets a large chunk of the episode when she and Malik want different summer camp experiences. [it's high school, guys. you'll be back next year.] Mr. Wolf has "couples therapy" with Lisa and Malik to decide which camp they should go to - sports or macrame. [how does everyone know what box-weaving is?? and why is there a couples therapy option? 21st century high schools are whack.] Although Malik rocks at macrame (see below outfit!), they decide to go to macrame camp because Lisa needs it more than he needs sports camp. [blah blah blah. let's get back to Lisa's possible adoption storyline!]

(ABC/MITCH HADDAD

Meanwhile, Sheila continues on her quest to make Noah aware that Eden may want to keep the baby when she points out that George is going to be the male voice with which the baby is more familiar. [this whole plot is SO RIDICULOUS!] Sheila suggests that Noah double the length of his visits, but Eden kicks him out after three hours. [why does he need "visits" anyway? Does Jill do this, too?] 

And, in a pretty useless plotline, Dalia's kangaroo keeps hiding things in its pouch and kicking people, so Dallas wants to put it in the guesthouse. [flashback to a moment in graduate school where I told my roommate that I'd want to be a kangaroo so I could lean back on my tail and kick people in the face...] George reminds Dallas that Dalia has given up a lot, so she may need to cave on this one. [Dalia likes Madea Goes to Jail? what are we setting up here? and did it strike anyone else as odd that ABC would have its characters reference a FOX show - The X-Files?]