House: Follow the Directions

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I caught the phrase, "we need the eggs" during the episode but don't really understand why that's the title of the installment. Anyone want to explain it for me? Not that it would really improve things... this was one of the stranger episodes in a while. The medical mystery was downright wonky - did we ever figure out WHY the patient was crying blood?? I didn't really care about the life-size doll and what the patient did with her, but I'm sure that some people found it amusing. Park and Adams having boyfriends is really just filler at this point... the show is going to end before either actually becomes part of a committed relationship. I did think that Taub was a bit hilarious, but I don't see where lying about it being the same baby was going to help things. Besides, we know that he sometimes has both children at the same time, so doesn't he have two of anything in his apartment? Wouldn't that be a big tip-off? And, lastly, House deciding that Dominika is good for him was a cop-out. If the show ends with him believing things will be "happily ever after," I will NOT be pleased.

House "We Need the Eggs" (S08E17): A guy wins his neighbor a teddy bear at a fair. [who puts a stuffed animal down on the ground at the fair?] He soon cries blood and is brought to the hospital. Adams thinks he inhales glue, but when she and Chase search the patient's home, the only unusual thing they find is a life-size doll. They bring it in and the patient admits to having sex with the $7,000 item. While

Cr: Ray Mickshaw/FOX

he knows that "Amy" isn't real, she fulfills him in a way that other women don't. House has the team swab out the doll but all they find is a mass in the doll's abdomen. Adams gets the patient's consent to operate on the doll, then they stitch up and bandage it as the patient nearly passes out (he's in liver failure now). Soon, the patient imagines the doll to be real, talk, stand, strip... and then he imagines her oozing blood from her incision. Taub realizes that the doll was only $5,000, so they deduce that he had it customized to look like a girl he used to know. The patient experiences light sensitivity, neck stiffness, and vomiting - Adams suggests meningitis. Turns out that he simply used tap water instead of distilled water in his neti pot. [this is why you follow the directions.] The whole experience did give him some confidence, though, as he manages to ask out Adams. She turns him down and suggests he date his neighbor. 

House's favorite "escort" is leaving the business to get married, so he tries to find a replacement, mainly based on her non-sexual skills. After all, "57 minutes out of the hour" is her doing other things he wants. [I liked Fawn's (the second candidate, who got the movie question "wrong") jacket.] House tries upping his prostitute's workload so she'll keep him as a client, because "you're the only hooker I know who can tune a piano." [why did they meet in the hospital cafeteria? I liked her nails.] House asks Wilson for advice on breaking up his hooker's potential marriage, then decided to get Dominika to seduce the guy and ruin the relationship. Except, the guy turns out to be the hooker's brother. It seems that House's favorite playmate just finds him rude for sleeping with her while his "wife" is in the next room. House opens Dominika's mail and finds out that she's been approved for citizenship, but throws out the letter. [again, follow the directions and give it to the rightful owner.] 

[and, the remaining drama:] A guy asks Park to jam, and she says she will. But, she chickens out and makes up excuses about her family instead. ["break your face" ??] After Taub insists, however, she decides to tell her mom she's working late and play "I Got You Babe" on the guitar with the guy. Taub picks up a woman at the grocery store, though he lies and says that Sophie's mother died in childbirth. On the second date, Taub comes clean about Sophie's mom.... but she realizes that it's a different baby, which Taub lies about anyway. [dumb move, buddy.] Adams asks Chase for a drink, but he thinks it's a bad idea.