Suburgatory: Being Alone

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

It's been a while now since George has been with a woman, which is probably rough on him because Noah is so rampantly "busy." Dallas has certainly been flirting around, but it's clear that she's without companionship as well. Half of the episode is about Tessa being alone, even when around her BFFs Malik and Lisa (which will apparently become either "Lisik" or "Malisa"). Even Dalia feels alone compared to Dallas, as her mother has a pet while she doesn't. At least we were spared a lonely guidance counselor! I suspect that Tessa and Ryan won't last long, that George will soon be in a relationship again, and that Dalia's kangaroo isn't going to keep her happy in the long run.

Suburgatory "Down Time" (S01E18): Lisa's mom takes her to the doctor because she's acting differently, but the only answer is that she's in love. [Sheila is so awkward!] Sheila points out that Lisa has had a very dull life until now, but she wants details from here on out, as she's now interesting. [that's SO insulting!] Tessa spends her lunch in the handicapped bathroom stall, which she has now decorated. [so I guess it's safe to say that nobody else EVER uses it? And why does Tessa make Lisa crawl under? gross!] Lisa tells her that she and Malik are in a "real relationship" now, so she won't have as much time for Tessa. [is this something teenagers actually tell one another when they get boyfriends? I feel like Sue and Carly on The Middle had a similar talk at one point? I certainly never informed my friends that I'd be seeing them less! talk about bragging!] Sheila has Malik over for breakfast and even invites him to sleep over - anything to get him to stay with Lisa. [whaaa?] Lisa and Malik try to set Tessa up with someone, but they talk to a dorky kid Tessa can't stand. ["I'm black, and black people know a lot about romance." ummm... does this show want to be as stereotypical as 2 Broke Girls? Because statements like this aren't helping anyone.] After a Friday night of eating butter, watching reality television, and brushing dolls' hair, Tessa talks to Ryan, Lisa's brother. He asks her out for the next night, though they go to the same fondue place where Lisa and Malik are acting lovey-dovey. [Ryan: "is this okay, because I know they don't serve any of the food that was listed on your pajamas." = best line of the night!]

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Now that Dallas' divorce is final, she finds herself bored, cramming her days with appointments. [what everyone does when they break up. or, at least those who aren't depressed.] After she winds up with an unexpected night alone, she's dying for company, so she agrees to do whatever George and Noah want. [proved by the fact that she packed for every possible day trip except the opera.] They go mattress shopping for Noah, and he practices humping the beds. [disturbing.] Dallas starts to fall apart, thinking that maybe her marriage failed because they had the wrong mattress. [yep. realizing stupidly small things could have gone wrong and caused the disaster. seen it!] Dallas lays on the bed for hours, and Noah even has to pick up Dalia from therapy and get her dinner. Oh, that's right. Dalia is in therapy five days a week, where she's learning to blame her mother's dog for the divorce. [intense, much??] While Noah cheers up Dalia by getting her a kangaroo (whose pouch is now home to her cell phone), the salesman leaves George the keys to lock up. [gross with the cell phone. and does the idea that her mom has a dog so she must also have a pet make sense? because I kinda think it doesn't.] George tells Dallas about his divorce to help her cope. [that's a LOT of jewelry for no reason, by the way. I loved that what cheered up Dallas was having to shop for a new, "depressed" wardrobe.]