Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Top 10 Man-Whores

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

As a follow-up to Top 10 TV Sluts, I thought it would be fitting to do something similar with male television characters as well.

10. Zack Morris (Saved by the Bell). While we don't know how many girls he actually had sex with, the promiscuity of his character is a major part of his personality throughout all three series. One-daters are frequent, and include many of his close friends as well as people we only see once. Notable gals: Shana, Kelly, Stacy, Tori, Leslie.

9. Jack McFarland (Will & Grace). The sole gay man to make the top ten, Jack considers nearly every "relationship" serious, regardless of how short it is. Many of his conquests have no names, and many are one-night stands. He hits on many men, and his reputation among his friends is that he sleeps around. Notable men: Stuart.

8. Will Smith (Fresh Prince of Bel-Air). While his sexually active status is not consistent throughout the series, he definitely makes it known that he has a way with the ladies and that he's keeping it real (yep, I know that line is from Smart Guy). But let's not lie, he was pretty fly for a high schooler. Notable women: Mimi, Kayla, Kathleen, Jackie, Lisa.

7. Tony DiNozzo (NCIS). More of a flirt than a follow-through player, but he'll flirt with pretty much any and every woman he encounters. His approach changes a little bit throughout the seasons, but his womanizing nature is probably here to stay. Women: Ari, Michelle, Paula, Jeanne.

6. Luka Kovac (ER). I find it intriguing that a man who lost his virginity on his wedding night became such a hotshot after the war killed his family. I can't even remember some of the names of the women he has had relations with. And he's not known for ending them on a positive note, either. Notable women: Carol, Chuny, Sam, Abby.

5. Gavin "Spinner" Mason (Degrassi: The Next Generation). I think of him as a player... but definitely one of the least attractive on the list, and not just physically. But he hasn't had the easiest life, and we all know how that goes, especially on sitcoms. Notable women: Paige, Manny, Darcy, Jane.

4. Jesse (Cochran) Katsopolis (Full House). I think that everyone understood him to be a ridiculous womanizer. Most of the gals seemed to only last an episode or so, and it was rather common that we'd see "old girlfriends," like when he ran away to Tahoe, when he went on the fishing trip, and various band episodes. At least he calmed down. Memorable ladies: Corrina, Cheryl, Denise, Becky.

3. Joey Tribbiani (Friends). He comes in at #3, surprisingly. At first I figured he would be at the top of the list, what with his "how YOU doin'?" and other antics, but it turned out that there's actually a few men worse than he is in this department. Anyway, without further ado, here's the only girls whose names I could remember... Angela, Melanie, Erin, Kathy, Kate, Katie, Lorraine, Charlie.

2. Glenn Quagmire (Family Guy). Yep, animation near the tip-top of the list. How many times have we seen MULTIPLE women coming out of Quagmire's house or car? Yep, I can't count, either. Names aren't important, and neither is ethnicity, body type, or even age to some degree. Named women: Joan, Loretta.

1. Barney Stinson (How I Met Your Mother). Barney has slept with over 200 women. He doesn't remember them all, but keeps a scrapbook. He also ends up having to create a bracket system to try and figure out who might have bad-mouthed him! He almost always sneaks out after a single night of sexual encounters, and he has jokes, catchphrases, and codes for his lifestyle. Some named women: Shannon, Rhonda, Robin

Didn't make the list but you could argue that he should have: Ricky Underwood (The Secret Life of the American Teenager). He has Adrian, Amy, (almost) Grace, and a reputation quite long at school and band camp.
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