Under the Dome: Tough for Newbies

This series is getting tougher to watch for newcomers, as the two most recent episodes build heavily on the season opener. In this day and age, it's not too difficult to locate recent installments of shows, so this might not seem like a big problem, but it would definitely be frustrating to see someone channel-surfing and stumble upon the program, only to turn it off when they're utterly lost over who is who and what's going on. This is strangely coupled with the fact that there are many issues in Chester's Mill that are contained within a single episode, like the acidic rain... or last season's run on supplies or epidemic. It's somewhat confusing to have both long-running arcs and short issues that one would imagine would recur. Toss in the fact that audiences are being introduced to more and more of Chester's Mill's residents and following this series is becoming as complicated as Degrassi... or at least the daily soaps!

Under the Dome "Infestation" (S02E02): The Dome Girl runs off to the woods, and Norrie and Joe find her and bring her back to BigJim's house. All she remembers is that something made her go to the school, and she heard Angie scream. Julia goes to Sam and learns his identity, plus he shows her the drawing his sister did twenty years earlier.

Rebecca is going to start teaching again, so when Junior goes to open the school, he finds Angie's body in the hallway, covered in butterflies. BigJim and Junior each think the other is responsible, and Junior wonders if he could have done it while drunk the previous night. Joe, angry about his sister's death, brings DomeGirl's shoe to the police station, and it's a match to a print found in Angie's blood. [wow, for a radio DJ, Phil sure is taking to this police officer thing!] Though DomeGirl is arrested, a preliminary autopsy shows that someone with much larger hands must have been the killer, so DomeGirl is innocent. [Julia sure seems to have a strong stake in the girl's life...] Still, Joe, Junior, and Norrie nearly kill her, yet she does not seem wary of them. Joe searches for Angie's bracelet before the funeral, and finds it, just in time to hear BigJim use the funeral to make sure everyone in town still trusts him. [huge eye rolls over here...]

The influx of butterflies has led to more caterpillars, which will eat up the plants under the dome, so Rebecca lights the brush on fire to kill off the insects, but that won't be enough. [Barbie, of all people, knows that caterpillars typically feed on milkweed?] Barbie and BigJim both want to be in charge of crop-dusting, but Barbie wins out, playing a hero when he flies too close to the dome and nearly crashes. [haha, BigJim had a reserve tank for when he made drug runs out of town!] But, Rebecca is now concerned that there aren't enough resources for the number of people living under the dome, so more deaths are imminent.

Under the Dome "Force Majeure" (S02E03): BigJim is interested in Rebecca, who is trying to harvest wind for power and has the kids head to the school to work on a windmill project. When they discover that they can access the internet, they check out email and twitter, and Junior gets a message from his mother that says she's alive, and to ask Lyle, the barber, for answers. [another new character to focus on?] The signal doesn't last, so they try to follow it, and wind up at the locker where Angie was killed. DomeGirl knows the combination somehow, and the locker is revealed to be empty. Joe uses the school office's records and old yearbooks to determine that DomeGirl is Melanie Cross, who had that locker in 1988, but hasn't aged. [creepy.]

When it rains, everyone plans to collect drinkable water, but it turns out that what's falling from the sky is red and acidic, injuring anyone with whom it comes into contact. [ouch!] Lyle kidnaps Rebecca when she and BigJim are driving along, leaving him to burn in the falling liquid.

Brownie Harris/CBS2014 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved.

BigJim radios for help, and Barbie, Julia, and Sam take off in the ambulance to save him. Meanwhile, Lyle believes that this is the apocalypse, and baptizes Rebecca by pouring the acid rain down her back. She starts going along with Lyle's beliefs, but he knows she's faking, and is about to hurt her worse when Julia, Barbie, and Junior (who recently learned from his uncle that his mother also had blackouts) arrive. Julia is talking Lyle down when Rebecca gets free and splashes rain at him. She then works on neutralizing the liquid, while Lyle is sent to prison, where Sam visits him and cryptically mentions that they made a promise 25 years ago. [how very I Know What You Did Last Summer...] Then, Junior goes to see Lyle, who says that he'll grant him full access if he gets him out of jail.

On top of all this, BigJim sets a mandatory citizen registration, which includes a survey to figure out how to best allocate people as time goes by. However, it turns out to really be a checklist to help Rebecca figure out how to thin the herd by 25%, as they're running out of food. [I'm unsure what angle Barbie is playing here...]

News Roundup: Early 2012 Scheduling

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

This is our first news round-up of the year, so it covers nearly three weeks of entertainment fun facts. Ergo, the full post was very long. So, we split it up into three posts to cover three areas, hoping it'll be more digestible for readers. Next week we plan to return to our normal, one-news-post-per-week schedule.

Renewals:
Flashpoint has been renewed for a fifth season.

Giuliana and Bill has been renewed for a fifth season.

USA renewed Psych for a seventh season.

TVLand renewed Hot in Cleveland for a fourth season.

The Glee Project was renewed by Oxygen for a second season.


Last Man Standing will now have 24 episodes this season instead of 22.

Cancellations:
You'll also start seeing Last Man Standing more often, since ABC canceled Work It after just two episodes.

So You Think You Can Dance has had its results show canceled.

China has canceled 88 television shows since October.

The Martha Stewart Show has been cancelled, partly due to high production costs. After April, only repeats will be running.

Other Scheduling Updates:
Fairly Legal and In Plain Sight will move to Friday on March 16th.

Life's Too Short, a faux documentary starring Warwick Davis as a fictionalized version of himself, will debut on February 19th on HBO. Look for it on Sundays. HBO's Luck debuts on Sunday, January 29th. HBO's Game of Thrones returns Sunday, April 1st, at 9pm for its second season.

Disney XD is going to launch "Marvel Universe" on Sunday, April 1st. It's a programming block that will feature the new animated series Ultimate Spider-Man.

Mad Men will return for a fifth season on March 25th, starting with a two-hour opener. The Killing returning on Sunday, April 1st.

Swamp People's third season will premiere on Thursday, February 9th.

Cougar Town is back February 14th.

Degrassi is back on Monday, February 20th on TeenNick.

Some ABC premiere dates: Don't Trust the B--- in Apartment 23 will premiere on Wednesday, April 11th. The River will premiere on Tuesday, February 7th. Scandal will premiere Thursday, April 5th. 

Sunday, April 8th is a big day for Showtime - Nurse Jackie, The Big C, and The Borgias are all back that night!

Being Human comes to BBC America on Saturday, February 25th at 9pm ET/PT. Absolutely Fabulous comes to the network on Sunday, February 12th at 11pm ET/PT.


Netflix's original series, Lilyhammer, will have its entire first season available to watch in the US and Canada, starting February 6th.

Can't wait to see Smash when it officially debuts on February 6th? You don't have to - some American Airlines flights will have it in-flight through January 30th, it'll stream on NBC.com and Hulu from January 23rd thru February 6th, and it'll be available thru February 6th on iTunes, Amazon Video on Demand, Xbox, Zune, Playstation, Vudu, and Samsung MediaHub.
New Comedy Central series Key & Peele (with eight episodes to start) begins Tuesday, January 31st at 10:30pm. The duo is most known for their improvisation and celebrity impressions. [Comedy Central Press Release]

Teen Mom is Back; If You Really Knew Me Started

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Dayless: this is a new category because of the way Degrassi: The Next Generation is running. They're playing it new episodes M-R and then an encore of the week on Fridays. I used to be a really big fan of this show, but it's been a while, as I lost some interest when the original core group went off to college, LoL. Anyway, I watched the movie to open the season, where some of the kids go to NYC, and others go crazy. I was surprised that Emma & Spinner got married... totally didn't see that coming. As much as I try to like Holly J., it's just not going to happen. I also just went to read about the season online, and found that all my old faves are recurring or gone completely... none are main characters anymore. So, although I watched the Degrassi Takes Manhattan movie, I have decided that I won't continue with the series this season. Too bad, it used to be sooo good.

Sunday:

Sons of Tucson (S01E11): Ron has used the calendar before, so either we're running these out-of-written-order, or the writers don't care about simple continuity. I love that he went through and analyzed music to decide what the top 40 words and phrases are instead of just finding this on the internet, LoL. Robbie driving was funny/scary.

Kate Plus Eight (S01Exx): not this week.

Monday:

The Secret Life of the American Teenager (S03E07): Ashley is so boring, I hated her early convo with Ricky over their attraction to one another. The chair thing was weird, especially suggested by Grace. Ricky's mom is annoying. again. Ben's dad has a JET?!? I mean, the guy is rich and important, but why would he need a jet?? Ricky's mom staying over and borrowing Ricky's car was awkward. I love how Lauren gets mad at Madison, calls for Jesse, and he comes running. hahahahaha. The crowd "oohing" at Adrian's announcement was dumb. Too bad for Tom, but at least Grace's mom knows about Jack living there. Ricky's final reaction to his mom going to jail again was surprising. Ashley and Anne's conversation was exceedingly boring. Great acting by Amy and Ben in the final scene. I was surprised that the cab just kinda sat there after it dropped off Amy, LoL. Lastly, regarding the scenes-from-the-next, Ricky goes to NY?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!???!

Cake Boss (S03E10): WOW! They have a cupcake-pan-filling machine!! Nobody seemed excited to skip out on the cannolis in favor of cupcakes (1,000 each of chocolate, vanilla, and red velvet). um, wait. There are PROFESSIONAL paintball players??!?? At least it's dying down, there USED to be 3-4 professional leagues, LoL. I was really curious as to what he was going to design, and the rendering only half-convinced me it would be cool, LoL. wait wait wait... INDOOR paintball?? This just keeps getting more and more amusing. I love that they called the bakers "doughboys" haha. I love that the new guy is still wearing a vest and tie to work. in a bakery. hahaha. Frost TEN cupcakes in ONE minute?? I take more than a minute PER cupcake, LoL (a big reason I don't really do cupcakes like I do real cakes, LoL). Dang, and he pulls it out in 53 seconds??!? I thought that the artichoke joke was funny. I liked that we went over how not even Buddy is perfect. The prank scene made me laugh. Between the camouflage and the waterguns there was a ton of painting that went into this cake. The cupcake thing looked successful, but how can they just CANCEL cannolis?

Huge (S01E04): Poppy might be arts & crafts? I don't know why we're continuing this property line argument. At first I couldn't believe that Becca read Will's journal... then I decided to admit I would've, too. That "Love Handles" show that they were watching looked ridiculous. Seeing the director at the meeting was semi-interesting. I was surprised that Poppy didn't follow through with Sierra to make sure that she was able to find a group for the talent show. Amber's hair looked pretty bad at the talent show. Why would the surveyor stick around for the talent show?? Nevermind, Poppy did something WITH Sierra, LoL. I cracked up laughing when Becca went out for "Baby Got Back" because of that lie she told Shea, haha. I wonder what her original plan was, since she was backstage, after all... I liked Alistair's jokes after his magic didn't pan out, haha. I really liked Ian's song... I'd probably buy the mp3 if it were real, LoL. Why was Chloe so easy to make-up with Amber after she stood her up?? Oh. She made out with a boy and wanted to gossip about it. hahaha. Will is being pretty mean to Ian. Can we get a new girl for that empty bunk?? I want another crazy storyline for the new kid, haha.

Tuesday:

Teen Mom (S02E01): I LOVE that Farrah called the cops on her mom, ahaha. That gigantic house and they have a house ACROSS THE STREET, too??

Why would Tyler say that he doesn't think they're ready to be engaged AFTER he proposed??!? I don't see why Catelynn had to move in like 24 hours... why not give her a couple days at least??

Maci and Ryan... the child support storyline is intriguing.

I like Amber's new hair. Why would she go to the doctor for a pregnancy test instead of buying one? It can't possibly be cheaper, LoL.

The upcoming scenes look like there's going to be a lot of interesting drama coming up this season! We still don't have an answer as to whether the second season of 16 and Pregnant will follow those teen moms in another version of Teen Mom or what.

If You Really Knew Me (S01E01): this is a new show that I didn't hear about until the last minute, but the premise was to break boundaries of high school cliques, so that piques my interest. I would have liked to have some demographics for the school... number of students, geographical location, etc. Okay, eventually we got some info: Freedom High School in Oakley, xx. 2400 students. Respect is the goal. I wonder how they broke down the kids because they can't all be in the same room at once, LoL. Actually, I just looked it up... they do 100 kids in a six-hour session for $3200 (before travel costs & etc.), so I sincerely doubt they actually had all 2400 kids participate. So now I wonder how the school chooses who will participate in this, and id having such a small amount of kids (only like 4% at this school) doing it will help make a difference in the long run. The "I don't actually like football" comment was interesting. That "Power Shuffle" game is old-hat to me. I learned it as "Cross the Line" and it's incredibly powerful, to the point where I actually kept something to myself, and I usually have no problem sharing anything if you just ask me. Intriguing that they didn't show those who identify as or know someone who identifies as LBGTQ (et al). There are definitely some hesitaters in this game, since there were some people who didn't even start to cross on ones like "has anyone ever been scared or lonely" until they realized that EVERYONE ELSE is, too. Roman and his dad were a little awkward, to me anyway. But maybe that's because I can't comprehend that idea of being friends with your parents. I never could've understood that, at any stage in my life, but that's beside the point. I was REALLY hard-pressed to believe that these kids actually went and hung out with new people. Although, I guess, similarly, it made me think about how much easier it made it to talk to people in college. The end was a little too The Breakfast Club for me.

up next: a school that is really suffering from cyber-bullying. My big question is wondering who their target audience is... running the show at 11pm??

Wipeout (S03E08 & S03E09): the diving boards proved to be an interesting obstacle. It was funny that so many people ended up in the middle on the second round. This is a really boring show today... no fantastically interesting contestants, no remarkable wipeouts... I don't really understand why RepoMan failed the sini-stairs his final try. CrazyCuban is really bad at the gauntlet, which is a shame when he lost 5+ minutes there.

Thursday's episode had some spinning hoops and the trampoline sweeper, so that was a little nice since they're not the norm. I also always love the trapeze bar. Again, wasn't too impressed with the middle two games, although there were some impressive wipeouts in the Wipeout Zone tonight. The first girl to do the final course was slow, but the next guy totally kept missing his exit from the spincycle, and gave up only about 5 minutes in. "thousands of gallons of foam??" sounds kinda high... The last girl landed HORRIBLY from the catapult.

Wednesday:

Hot in Cleveland (S01E06): Melanie's parents sound crazy overprotective! The mirrored surface joke was nice for the narcissist father. The viral joke was nice, too. LOVED the bedazzled comment. The "free hamburger night" weirded me out. How large is this house that both guests can stay in their own rooms

Minute to Win It (S02E03): continuation of Kim & Aaron.

Game 9: Extreme Nutstacker: stack the hex nuts from a chopstick so they're 10 nuts high and stay for 3+ seconds. The new trick is that instead of doing it on a table, you're doing it on a board that you're holding. She goes first, fails with 10 seconds to go on her 9th nut. He tries second, and talks to himself like a jerk. He gets them all there but they only stay for 2 seconds before toppling. He tries their third time, and he gets it. They're really excited, and they should be, since nobody has ever won game 9 before.

They decide not to go for Game 10, and just walk. They're also pretty much the first people to walk, too. Of course, the gap between 500k and 250k is much higher than some of the only fallbacks, LoL. I did, however, think asking the parents and the parents' subsequent responses was/were boring/dumb.

And now we're doing a random match-up. The girl is like 40 and in a ton of debt, and I kinda hated her stupid background story. The guy is a college graduate who looks like a fun-loving guy. I'm really not a fan of the current "you did it" song they're playing. I am also really starting to hate how they bring in family members. AGAIN with the phone call, it had Kyle ALL worked up and upset... how's he supposed to perform to the best of his ability after that??!?
Game 1: Octopus: Get 3 out of 12 pulls of a streamer from under an inverted bottle. He gets it.
Game 2: Whipper Snapper: Launch a ping pong ball 15 feet into a bucket using a towel that is taped to the floor on one end. She goes for it, and at 30 seconds he starts looking really worried.
Game 3: By a Thread: 10 eyelets, graduated in size, are in needles. Thread all of them with a single piece of thread, largest eye to smallest. She pretty much demands it, and kicks the challenge's butt, doing it in about 40 seconds.
Game 4: Spoon Frog: Use a teaspoon to flip a teaspoon into a cup. Get it three times, unlimited tries. He fails, not able to get the third in time. She seems concerned to let him try again, but he does. This time, he gets the first two really quickly and nails the third with like 33 seconds left.
Game 5: Sticker Picker Upper: Roll an egg around a platter to collect three stickers... don't let the egg roll off. And you can only hold the platter with one hand. He goes for it. He gets it with some time left.
Game 6: Raisin the Bar: Flick the raisin boxes out from under the soda bottles. You have to get 4 out of 10. She runs out of tries to get her final one, after getting the very first! He rushes in to go for it, and saves the day.
Game 7: Propeller Head: Launch propellers to get them to land in a box 15 feet away. You have a ton of them to work with. He goes for it (... again. I'm tired of him taking over at this point). He gets it in the first 7-8 seconds. Of course.
And, he even dominates in the end, when he exclaims that they walk at $125,000. She seemed a little hesitant, but didn't seem to want to argue the point on television. Whatever.

Newsflash: all competitors attend a Minute to Win It training camp. Also, I'm starting to wonder why we're doing all these couples' episodes... I think they want a lot of contestants, but don't want to give away a lot of money... so they pair them up and they have to share the prize, LoL. Also, I had been wondering, we found out that you can go a maximum of three times in a row before the other player HAS TO go. Lastly, it seems that next week we're getting a bunch of new, summer-themed games. Wonder how that'll go...

Thursday:

Futurama (S06E06): haha, I haven't seen a war reenactment in a while. and "good war" had me cracking up. also liked the "only gone in an hour, but you need to file, so let's go over alphabetical order" and Hermes starts singing the "ABC Song."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Off season/Coming Up:
19 Kids and Counting (Season 5 starts August 10th at 9pm)
Melissa & Joey (starts Aug 17th at 8pm)
Little People, Big World (season 6 starts September 6th)
House, M.D. (season 7 starts September 20th)

How I Met Your Mother (season 6 starts September 20th)
The Simpsons (season 22 starts September 26th)
Family Guy (season 9 starts September 26th)

Mr. Sunshine (new show, starts in the Fall on ABC)
South Park (have not yet heard, but I assume October or so)
Table for 12: (missing "summer," "busy day," "jumping in," "brace yourself," "back to school")

16 and Pregnant (unknown)

Top 10 Man-Whores

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

As a follow-up to Top 10 TV Sluts, I thought it would be fitting to do something similar with male television characters as well.

10. Zack Morris (Saved by the Bell). While we don't know how many girls he actually had sex with, the promiscuity of his character is a major part of his personality throughout all three series. One-daters are frequent, and include many of his close friends as well as people we only see once. Notable gals: Shana, Kelly, Stacy, Tori, Leslie.



9. Jack McFarland (Will & Grace). The sole gay man to make the top ten, Jack considers nearly every "relationship" serious, regardless of how short it is. Many of his conquests have no names, and many are one-night stands. He hits on many men, and his reputation among his friends is that he sleeps around. Notable men: Stuart.







8. Will Smith (Fresh Prince of Bel-Air). While his sexually active status is not consistent throughout the series, he definitely makes it known that he has a way with the ladies and that he's keeping it real (yep, I know that line is from Smart Guy). But let's not lie, he was pretty fly for a high schooler. Notable women: Mimi, Kayla, Kathleen, Jackie, Lisa.


7. Tony DiNozzo (NCIS). More of a flirt than a follow-through player, but he'll flirt with pretty much any and every woman he encounters. His approach changes a little bit throughout the seasons, but his womanizing nature is probably here to stay. Women: Ari, Michelle, Paula, Jeanne.








6. Luka Kovac (ER). I find it intriguing that a man who lost his virginity on his wedding night became such a hotshot after the war killed his family. I can't even remember some of the names of the women he has had relations with. And he's not known for ending them on a positive note, either. Notable women: Carol, Chuny, Sam, Abby.


5. Gavin "Spinner" Mason (Degrassi: The Next Generation). I think of him as a player... but definitely one of the least attractive on the list, and not just physically. But he hasn't had the easiest life, and we all know how that goes, especially on sitcoms. Notable women: Paige, Manny, Darcy, Jane.

4. Jesse (Cochran) Katsopolis (Full House). I think that everyone understood him to be a ridiculous womanizer. Most of the gals seemed to only last an episode or so, and it was rather common that we'd see "old girlfriends," like when he ran away to Tahoe, when he went on the fishing trip, and various band episodes. At least he calmed down. Memorable ladies: Corrina, Cheryl, Denise, Becky.



3. Joey Tribbiani (Friends). He comes in at #3, surprisingly. At first I figured he would be at the top of the list, what with his "how YOU doin'?" and other antics, but it turned out that there's actually a few men worse than he is in this department. Anyway, without further ado, here's the only girls whose names I could remember... Angela, Melanie, Erin, Kathy, Kate, Katie, Lorraine, Charlie.


2. Glenn Quagmire (Family Guy). Yep, animation near the tip-top of the list. How many times have we seen MULTIPLE women coming out of Quagmire's house or car? Yep, I can't count, either. Names aren't important, and neither is ethnicity, body type, or even age to some degree. Named women: Joan, Loretta.

1. Barney Stinson (How I Met Your Mother). Barney has slept with over 200 women. He doesn't remember them all, but keeps a scrapbook. He also ends up having to create a bracket system to try and figure out who might have bad-mouthed him! He almost always sneaks out after a single night of sexual encounters, and he has jokes, catchphrases, and codes for his lifestyle. Some named women: Shannon, Rhonda, Robin

Didn't make the list but you could argue that he should have: Ricky Underwood (The Secret Life of the American Teenager). He has Adrian, Amy, (almost) Grace, and a reputation quite long at school and band camp.

Top 10 TV Sluts

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

10. Ally McBeal (Ally McBeal). the dancing babies really should be an obvious notion that Ally is always trying to find a relationship. With her biological clock ticking, Ally tries hard to find a soul mate... encountering many sexual relationships along the way. Notable men in her life: Billy, Greg, Brian, Larry.







9. Grace Adler (Will & Grace). Aside from having the constant fear that yet another boyfriend will "turn gay," Grace is out on the prowl regularly. She meets men in the most random places, and really wants to find someone solid in her life... but at the same time demanding a lifestyle of fun. Notable men in her life: Danny, Will, Josh, Leo, Nathan






8. Lois Griffin (Family Guy). Many of her conquests remain a mystery, yet she seems proud of her promiscuous past. The typical rebel of an upper-class family, teenage Lois did an assortment of drugs, drank, and yet was crowned Miss Rhode Island. She makes vague references of forced miscarriages, and has stated a past tried-curiosity with lesbianism. Notable men in her life: Peter, Bill Clinton, Glenn Quagmire.






7. Kelly Taylor (Beverly Hills, 90210). While she tried hard to change her image for a while, Kelly never really stopped having the "easy" reputation that many sluts end up with. She's been raped and date-raped, has had many one-time-only dates, but a lot of long-term men as well. Interestingly, her on-again, off-again relationships are probably what she is best known for. Notable men in her life: Dylan, Jake, Brandon, Steve, Colin, Matt.

6. Hilda Spellman (Sabrina, The Teenage Witch). While she has the advantage of having hundreds of years to have spent with different men, we often only hear about the last century or so. She was quite the partier before raising Sabrina, as it is revealed that the second floor of the house was a disco, she spent many late nights on the town, and many weekends in Tuscany. Notable men in her life: Drell, Will, Willard (Mr. Kraft).






5. Rachel Green (Friends). We know that she was popular in high school and college, having many boyfriends (particularly before the rumor about her being a hermaphrodite began circulating), sometimes several at once. She is a constant flirt throughout the show, hardly changing even after the birth of her daughter. The reason she's not higher on this list is probably because the role of promiscuity seems natural for her. Notable men in her life: Barry, Ross, Paolo, Joey, Mark, Josh, Danny, Tag, Paul, Gavin.

4. Adrian Lee (The Secret Life of the American Teenager). At only seventeen years old, this character already has quite the following. She is known as "the school slut" even though we only know of two lovers who go to that school. Obviously there were more before Ricky. Adrian flaunts herself, and derives a great deal of pleasure from being considered sexy. Notable men in her life: Ricky, Max, Jack, Antonio.






3. Nina Van Horn (Just Shoot Me). We never find out her exact age, or her exact number of partners, for that matter. But we know it is high, and that she doesn't remember a lot of them, particularly due to the number of drugs she uses. But she's not shy about it, and makes sure that her body isn't "going downhill" as she ages, showing it off to anyone who will look, really. Notable men in her life: well, most didn't have names or stick around long enough, LoL. There was Robert, he counts.

2. Manny Santos (Degrassi: The Next Generation). While her character is currently in college, Manny started her promiscuity incredibly young, and that's how she got to near the top of this list... her numbers are quite high. She was not yet in high school when she began dressing sexy, and by the time she reached grade 9, she was already in the principal's office for wearing noticeable thongs and midriff-bearing shirts, among other things. After her abortion of Craig's baby, it becomes hard to follow exactly whom Manny is after from time to time. Notable men in her life: Jay, Craig, Sully, JT, Spinner, Damian, Mick, Kelly.

1. Samantha Jones (Sex and the City). well, let's begin with the fact that she defines herself as "try-sexual," as in she'll try anything sexual once. We know of two abortions. We know of countless (really) one-night stands. She even had a serious relationship with a woman (Maria). Notable men in her life: Richard, Smith, James. seriously, there are too many to count.

The Top 10 Unseen Television Characters

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

you know. the characters which never appear, but are often referenced. They might even speak, but no face is ever given to the name. Some shows use this convention more than others, but there are definitely some memorable characters which have no formal physical appearance.

10. Charlie Brown's Teacher (Peanuts), whose voice is created by a trombone (although someone once told me it was actually a muted trumpet, so that may also be the case). She's the one animated character to make the list, and I think it may be because the "voice" amused me from a young age.

9. The Gooch (Diff'rent Strokes), Arnold's foil. Bet you forgot about him, eh? Well, he was mentioned plenty of times... teasing Arnold, daring Arnold, fighting with Arnold, all sorts of childhood mischief.

8. Cousin Jeffrey (Seinfeld), the one that Uncle Leo is always bragging about. He was rumored to have kissed one of Jerry's girlfriends. He worked for the Park (Central Park, maybe? I'm not sure) and once got Jerry some concert tickets. Considering how often other members of Jerry's family were seen, I'm completely unsure as to why we didn't see Jeffrey even once.

7. Dr. Kahn (Salute Your Shorts), the camp director whom none of the characters seem to have seen, either. His voice was heard over the loudspeaker (almost) every episode, and Counselor Ug seems quite afraid of him.

6. Vera Peterson (Cheers), Norm's wife. You might argue that she shouldn't be on this list, since her legs are on camera, and I believe her torso is seen once as well. But Norm speaks of her semi-regularly, and the other characters seem to have a grasp of her as well, so she still counts as unseen.

5. Heather Sinclair (Degrassi: The Next Generation), Holly J's older sister, who is pretty much everyone's enemy. Paige specifically doesn't like her, but many of the characters talk about Heather in an unpleasant tone throughout the show.

4. George Steinbrenner (Seinfeld), George Costanza's boss while he worked for the Yankees. We see the back of his large office chair, and hear him speak almost constantly (his voice is not by the real George Steinbrenner). I wonder if that's why we don't see him... because he is an actual person and didn't want to be on the show.


3. Stanley Walker (Will & Grace), Karen's rich and obese husband. Technically you see his feet and hands at separate times, but he's talked about a crazy amount of time without actually ever being seen. His character ends up with quite the storyline, including jail, (faked) death, divorce, and financial difficulties.

2. Maris Crane (Frasier), Niles' first wife. She's spoken of throughout all eleven seasons, although she and Niles divorced several years into the show. She specifically was never seen because it became too difficult to properly portray her due to all of the crazy attributes which she gathers throughout the series.

1. Alma Borland (Home Improvement), Al's often-ridiculed mother. Since Al and his brother Cal look so much alike, and it's made clear that one takes after the mother and one takes after the father, mom & dad must also look quite similar. That, and Tim's frequent teasing of Al about his mother's size (among other things) really made me want to see how they'd cast her. Alas, it never happened, despite the fact that Al had two planned weddings.


The other major contenders: The Gibblers (Full House), Kimmy's family, that includes two parents, an older brother, and possibly three sisters. Dr. Claw (Inspector Gadget), the guy always plotting against Inspector Gadget. Nanny (Muppet Babies), although we do see her striped socks. Mr. & Mrs. Urkel (Family Matters), Steve's parents. Sparky (M*A*S*H), the radio operator. The Ditmeyer Family (Brady Bunch), the neighbors to Mike, Carol, and family.