Suburgatory: Who Steals Shirley Temple Dolls?

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Suburgatory "Don't Call Me Shirley" (S01E04): There's been a doll robbery at Sheila's... apparently she has a lot of Shirley Temple collectibles. [collections are fine. bins upon bins of doll clothes? Not so fine.] In suburgatory, that means that the nieghborhood is now grinding their teeth, giving George's HS friend plenty of opportunities to bank it on making mouth guards. [yep. still hating that guy...] And, George might be able to sell some panic rooms to those same freaked-out folks... Dallas (who apparently doesn't eat in public??!?) wants one immediately. [Who was Lisa eating lunch with in the cafeteria?] Dallas and Dahlia waltz over and plan to stay with Tessa and George overnight because they don't feel safe. The general family dynamic changes quickly, with Dallas taking over dinner and moving around George's delicates. Sheila comes over just to announce that the dolls have not yet appeared online for sale... and wonders if the theft was a personal attack. [I'm sorry, what was the purpose of making this announcement/] Dahlia picks on Tessa and Tessa retaliates by pointing out that she wears so much mascara that she can't blink. [hahahahaha!] 

ABC.com

George and Tessa hear something in the night and go looking around, only to find Dallas eating a sandwich in the laundry room. [so strange!] By the next morning, Dallas and George had become friends and were planning weekend events for them and their children. In a plan hatched by Tessa, Dahlia (at school) accuses Tessa of stealing the dolls, and she admits to it. Her father is called into the guidance counselor's office, and Tessa is still sticking to the story. He brings her to Sheila's to apologize, but it turns out that Lisa stole them. [really? this show is so messed up.]