Suburgatory: Dalia Does a Favor, Lisa Annoys Tessa

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I'm still not a fan of Dallas and George. Her "faking" was very annoying for me, as was how flippant Dalia can be from one moment to the next. It was semi-interesting to have the Ks follow around someone else for a change, but I don't think it lasted long enough to be truly intriguing. Additionally, Tessa is just too good at heart sometimes and it's driving me crazy. Oh, and Tessa has a Microsoft Surface, in case you missed it. I'm not sure how you could have, because the entire episode of "Friendship Fish" was a love-fest with the tablet. Not that I have a problem with it (I accompanied two friends to the Microsoft Store the morning they went on sale), but I thought it was so forced I was laughing at times. Did you find it as contrived as I did?

Suburgatory "Foam Finger" (S02E04): Dallas repeats a crazy entrance to impress George... including a gospel choir! After kissing, Dallas claims that she's had an orgasm and is tuckered out. [um... WHAT??] They decide to take Tessa and Dalia to Chinese to tell them about their new relationship, and though Tessa takes it well, Dalia is secretly upset. She's got a lot of issues, though, as her father and Wan'Er eloped. Dallas is so hurt, in face, that she decides to help a geek with a magic trick, but Tessa helps break that up and gets Dalia's hair back to blond from the brunette she had dyed it to match the bride's. [this was a screwy storyline that was made worse by Dalia and Tessa only getting along in a "when I need you, be there. otherwise, stay away" relationship. and what was with that Jewish ritual to Evan's picture??]

 ABC/ADAM TAYLOR

After Dallas spreads the news that George is great in bed, he tries to correct the guys in the locker room, then tells her that they need to be real... so they get to it.

 ABC/ADAM TAYLOR

While Dalia is off being emo (having told the Ks that she's going to Singapore for her father's second wedding), her posse flocks to Tessa, who pawns them off on Lisa. [all because Tessa told them not to walk in the street?? get real!]

Suburgatory "Friendship Fish" (S02E06): Dallas gives George a makeover, just before his friends from Manhattan show up. [at least he didn't wind up looking like Noah!] After he serves them diet grapefruit spritzers, they question what he's been up to. [yeah, I would, too.] He talks about installing skylights as his main line of work now, and they call him a "Real Housewife," so they go to dinner so George can try to act tough once more. [haha!] The guys keep talking about how fake everything is around there, and Fred and Noah show up to act like George's posse. [Grease is the best that Fred can do? mashing the male AND female roles of the 50s??] Theo and Cyrus are not impressed by Dallas, either, and George winds up leaving the dinner early. [If George went to college with Theo, wouldn't he also known Noah? or wouldn't that at least be a talking point?] Dallas suggests that George get them back by under-cutting their bid on a big upcoming project, but it doesn't work out.

Lisa and Malik's breakup was messy, and while he's willing to talk things out, she just wants her scrunchies back. [oh, Lisa!] Lisa is lonely and decides to spend time with Tessa, bringing a trunk of "sleepover essentials," like stuff to scrapbook, airbrush, and tie-dye... as well as a dead fish she got at summer macrame camp. Legend has it that if two people partake of the same fish, they'll be friends forever, and Lisa has been smoking the fish with an electric smoker in her bedroom closet for four weeks. [holy.cow.] After stalling as long as she could (carving watermelon helmets and airbrushing t-shirts),Tessa is momentarily saved from eating the fish when a caricaturist shows up and does a drawing of the girls. [I didn't get that... Lisa had arranged for a caricaturist to do random drawings??] To save herself, Tessa calls Sheila anonymously as a fire marshal, so Lisa has to leave. [hahaha!] But, Tessa comes clean the next day, and they eat some of the fish... which lands Tessa in the hospital with food poisoning. [Tessa is so sweet it's ridiculous.] When the hospital couldn't reach George, Tessa's grandmother, Helen, is called, and she's worried that Tessa needs her more than she thought. [not sure that adding her as a recurring character is going to work for me. what do you think?]