Cake Boss: The Next Great Baker: Congratulations, Marissa!

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I'm actually not going to say much here, since I think that a) plenty happened and we should just get to it, and b) I did quite a bit of in-recap remarking anyway. Still, a couple of general notes. First, the "Pre-Show" was clearly shot after the finale... Wes is AT the finale presentation but is talked about having already passed away at the pre-show. So, everyone there already knew that Marissa was the winner. [which, by the way, I realize is a spoiler. That's part of the reason we didn't post late last night - people who wanted to be able to watch the finale for themselves should have twelve hours to do so, LoL.] I thought that this was odd, but I'm not going to put up a fight. Also, regarding the pre-show... sometimes, seeing people watch tapes of themselves is interesting. In this case, I was not thrilled with how this worked... the reactions of the competitors to their own experiences were great at times, but there was a whole lot of boring going on with their reactions otherwise. With the actual finale, I was torn over who I thought would win... I had a feeling that Ryan was going to lose early on, just because of his recipe problems. Listening to their ideas, I thought that Nadine had something really unique going... but her final product just ended up being so underwhelming, I was a bit sad for her. Anyway, let's dive in...

Cake Boss: The Next Great Baker "Finale Pre-Show" (Special): Clinton Kelly is with Buddy, and all of this season's contestants are there to talk about the entire experience. Note, Wesley and Megan are absent - Wesley has already died and Megan appears via satellite for just a couple of minutes. We learn about everyone's first impressions about the others, specifically who they thought was the toughest competition - Jasmine, Chad, and Ryan top the list. [I favored Jasmine quite a bit in the beginning. I thought that she and Nadine were gonna go far.] We relive some of the Baking Challenges - like what desserts were really bad. Buddy says that his favorite was the one with the fifty-pound bags, since he loved watching the girls fight to the finish with the running with flour and sugar. Another stand-out moment in this section was Chad crying upon seeing some clips of himself, and he explains that he's really emotional in general. [really? did anyone not pick up on that by now? Also, I love that they talked about how Heather G. didn't know what a CD player looked like.] Marissa and Minerva get into an argument yet again, which was great. Then, Buddy and his wife both state that they believe Minerva "faked sick" that one time. Lisa also brings up the fact that Minerva left so disrespectfully. [thank you!!] Buddy reiterates that Wesley, Tony, and Jasmine all got ousted prematurely because of Minerva. Jasmine STILL believes that her cake was better than Wesley's. [I liked that she's still standing up for her cake, but it was funny nonetheless.] Tony is asked why he didn't fight back - and he says that he was at fault. He has, however, brought a life-size cake of Buddy to show that he can do life-size cakes. [that was cool.]

Things wind down a bit and we meet Heather G's baby, who is 29 days old already. They take a moment in memory of Wes, which brings tears to quite a few pairs of eyes. Trying to move onto a more positive note, Ryan says that the best, defining moment for him was even making it onto the show. Buddy then does some talking, mentioning how everyone in the room has talent, but what impressed him the most about the final three were Nadine's creativity, talent, and the ability to maintain her cool, Ryan's skills for only being in the business for two years, and how Marissa threw up and then came back to win triathlon. [interesting choices, Buddy. I think the comment about Ryan was a bit of a cop-out, though.]

We end with each of the already-eliminated contestants sharing their picks for who will win the finale - Heather M and Heather G pick Nadine. Chad, Melo, Sara, and Jasmine pick Marissa. Tony and Minerva pick Ryan. [what, they couldn't have had Megan write-in her choice or something?] 

Cake Boss: The Next Great Baker "...And the Winner Is?" (S02E10): We hear from the final three contestants... Marissa thinks that Nadine is a contender and that Ryan is not. Ryan thinks that he's got it in the bag, and that he's better than Marissa. As per her usual, Nadine doesn't really talk about the others. [I didn't mind this for the longest time, but it has finally gotten to me and I'm sick of it.]

Baker's Challenge - Crack as many eggs as you can in one minute. There are 90 possible eggs. Marissa is ready. Ryan is nervous. Buddy demonstrates thirty eggs for the trio, so that they can see his methodology. Marissa is excited about the challenge, and Ryan is nervous. [I'm not sure why there are 90 possible eggs... what's the record for most eggs cracked in one minute??] Watching their techniques, Marissa is looking to have an early lead since Ryan and Nadine are both a little slow. Ryan realizes he isn't great at this, and ends up with only 26. Nadine tries two at a time, but when the clock is up, she only has 28. Marissa comes in first with a whopping 35! [Nadine wasn't a "close" second... that wording could have been different...]

Then, Buddy takes the group to the baking room, telling them that they're going to run the bakery for a day. [strikingly similar to what happened at the end of the first season, but less pastries and no theme cake.] Each contestant needs to make a variety of desserts to fill the showcases, then sell them. They get 8 hours to fill the cases with at least 400 cookies, 20 pies, 20 cakes, and 100 pastries. Cakes are sold for ten tickets, pies for five, pastries for three, and cookies for two. In one hour, the baker with the most tickets wins, and the baker with the least goes home.

Ryan is worried since his wife is the baker, he's the decorator. [and, that's a legitimate thing to worry about here!] Marissa picks her team first, since she won the Baker's Challenge. She chooses SisterLisa as her salesperson, Joey as her baker, and Hermon as her helper. She's nervous about working with them since they all have been working together for a while and have more experience than she does. [great that she's thinking about this.] Nadine picks Grace, Danny, and Cousin Jay. Ryan gets the leftovers: Madeline, Cousin Anthony, and Anthony the helper. [I'm not very familiar with either of these helpers... anyone recognize them?] Ryan is worried that Cousin Anthony doesn't have as much experience as the other bakers. [and, combined with Ryan's novice baking abilities, this could spell trouble...]

Nadine - She's planning to make coconut macaroons, chocolate-almond biscotti, chocolate chip cookies, lemon raspberry cake, chocolate mousse cake, pumpkin and turtle pies, and cream puffs. [why are cream puffs the go-to pastry for everyone? I mean, I get that they're pretty easy, but there are so many other pastries that are ten times as delicious!] Grace's inexperience baking is definitely a bit of an issue for the team, but they overall move along okay. [wow... measuring eggs in quarts?? geez.] When Buddy and Mary coem to do taste-tests, they say that the macaroons are good, the biscotti is too salty, the chocolate chip cookies are good, and the chocolate mousse was good. Later that morning, they run out of whipped cream shortly before time is up. As the selling winds down, they have a pan of cookies and cream puffs left. Nadine sells the most, earning 1,467 tickets. 

Marissa - She plans to make sugar cookies, chocolate chip cookies, "everything but the kitchen sink" cookies, red velvet cake, chocolate-peanut butter cake, flourless chocolate cake, pumpkin and pecan pies, coconut-blueberry tarts, and cream puffs. [there's a lot of chocolate options in there, but things like blueberry and pumpkin kinda help.] SisterLisa can bake, so that helps the team, but the cakes aren't rising correctly for some reason. The bigger problem? The cream puffs aren't puffing up, but that turns out to be because they weren't in a rack oven. Re-doing them solves the problem though. The Buddy-Mary taste-test reveals that the chocolate chip cookie is okay, the peanut butter icing is too peanut buttery, the red velvet isn't bad, and the flourless chocolate is good. Marissa ends up with the most at the end of the baking period.... this does make her have a lot left over after the selling period, though. She earns 1,428 tickets at the end, a difference of only 39 tickets from Nadine! [wow, that's pretty close.]

Ryan - He plans to make sugar cookies (in the shapes of footballs and balloons), chocolate chip cookies, cranberry biscotti, chocolate-peanut butter mint pie, chocolate mousse pie, vanilla cake, and chocolate cake. [we don't really hear mention of what his pastry is, and I didn't see anything in the showcase - anyone catch what it might have been?] Between Madeline not have a lot of baking experience and constant butting-of-heads with Anthony, Ryan is off to a slow start. On the first round of chocolate chip cookies, something goes wrong with when he added the sugar or something, so Ryan tells him to do it over again. Unfortunately, Anthony the Helper screws things up next, using Nadine's team's cookie dough instead! [that whole situation was a bit fishy... what was the dough doing on the wrong side of the room anyway?] Then, they have a problem with the buttercream recipe... the butter didn't cream or something, and Ryan tells Anthony that it must have been too cold. [I hate working with butter sometimes, I get impatient and microwave it, LoL.] Anthony claims that the recipe must have been wrong, and Ryan begins to think that he knows more than Anthony.

Credit: TLC/
Walling McGarity

They make up, luckily Anthony takes the first step.  The taste-test reveals that Ryan's chocolate chip cookies are so flat they're not worth eating or selling, the vanilla cake is gritty and sucks (which Ryan doesn't believe), and the biscotti is good. [well, baking really does seem to be Ryan's downfall...] When time runs out, he's worried that he has much less than either of the others, and ends up running out of things to sell with two minutes left in the competition. [well, that's a sure sign that you didn't bake enough!] He thinks this is a good sign, though, until he learns that he only earned 881 tickets, so he's sent home. His final words are that Buddy wouldn't want to work with the "true Marissa." [well that's a pretty interesting comment. She's had her rough moments, she's said some rude/mean things, but I don't think she'd be too bad to work with.]

Elimination Challenge: At 2:30 in the morning, Marissa is happy that Nadine is her final competitor, as she'd be happy if Nadine beat her. Buddy says that the challenge is to make a cake that brings out a personalized American Dream. The cake needs to be 4 feet tall, and they have ten hours to do it. They are able to pick their team from some of the Carlo's staff, and they alternate, starting with Nadine, since she earned more tickets. Nadine starts with Mauro, then Marissa picks Ralph. [solid starts!] Nadine picks Juan and Marissa picks Frankie. [I wonder if Nadine went with Juan purely to ensure that she'd get a sculptor and that Marissa wouldn't take two of them. Otherwise, what's the point in picking the remaining sculptor when you could have first crack at the girls?] Nadine picks Liz, Marissa picks Sunshine, Nadine picks Rachel, and Marissa gets Kerry. [I didn't really recognize Kerry. anyone else?] The judging ends up taking place in a large auditorium, where the girls' family and friends are gathered, plus the other contestants (including Wesley). The judges are Buddy, Mary, and Randy Renoli (a fashion director from Say Yes to the Dress).

http://tlc.howstuffworks.com

Nadine - When she was a kid, she loved baking in a small town in Minnesota. She moved to NYC for the opportunity. So, she decides to do her cake as clouds to show her dreams, with Minnesota on the first cloud, then a globe and suitcase, culinary stuff, New York, and Carlo's Bakery at the top. The trouble is, the clouds are difficult to form, and neither Nadine nor Mauro like how they're going, but neither know how to fix it. Mauro comes up with an idea, but it's just buttercream on a board. Nadine is too tired to come up with much else... but then he suggests that they use the cereal treats as the clouds, which helps. [helps as in gives it form. There's still very little "substance" there. I don't think that her cake looks that great - there's good detail, but the cake itself isn't that spectacular.] Randy says that Nadine's cake has a clear story. [but he says the same thing about Marissa's...] Mary says that the tiers are nice, but overall it lacks color - Randy agrees. [I hadn't noticed, but now that I look at it, it makes sense.] They also say that the poles should be more finished somehow. [good point.] Buddy says that Nadine's vision was ambitious, and asks her to make one last plea as to why she should win - she says that she started baking when she was 13, it brings her happiness, and that she left her family to follow a dream. She begins crying when she talks about her mother's support. [her mom crying in the audience was a nice touch.]

http://tlc.howstuffworks.com

Marissa - She's from Jersey, which will be the foundation for her cake. She wants to add school on there, since she almost didn't graduate HS, didn't get into any 4-year-schools, and had to find something she was good at. [what an interesting addition... maybe she should have mentioned this fact earlier in the season.] Her family is her rock, so that will also be on the cake. She's struggling because she's exhausted, so she tells the team to tell her the truth on her idea and whatnot. Sunshine makes the rock tier. [there's way more "rock" than I was expecting from her original description.] Frankie makes the base and the New Jersey. [I was a little sad that the state's outline became so covered up and difficult to see, unless you were standing above it I guess.] The statue of liberty, the boat, and the Marissa character are Ralph's responsibilities. Ralph also adds George Washington. [I really thought that there was going to be more discussion or critique about this one, but I guess it fit enough that nobody wanted to fight about it?] Marissa is worried that the rest of her team is working as hard as they need to, since they don't have as much on the line. [on one hand, that makes a lot of sense. With the previous episodes, everyone had something to lose. on the other hand, these folks are professionals, so it's not like they want to goof off...] She loves her cake in the end and has no regrets. She does have one issue come up though...when they load the cake into the truck, Frankie badly hurts his finger checking the refrigeration unit. They call an ambulance and we see the injured (though not severed) finger. Frankie is in wonderful spirits about the whole thing, miraculously. [though I'm surprised nothing is brought up later at the judging... not that I would know what I wanted to hear, LoL.] Mary says that Marissa's cake has a nice bottom, but there's too much rock. [agreed.] Randy says that the story is clear at first glance. Buddy adds that, overall, she did a good job. Marissa says that she should win because she knows she can do this, she wants it, and she's happy that she's good at something. She cries and drops to the floor when Buddy announces that she won. [yay. I would have been happy for either girl, but she really looked thrilled to win.]

And, yes, Buddy mentioned that a third season is likely, so head on over to tlc.com if you think you have what it takes!

News Roundup: Lots of Picked-Up Pilots

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Renewals, Cancellations, & Scheduling:
HBO's Treme won't air season three until the fall, even though the previous seasons began in April.

FOX's Touch will launch in more than 100 countries (including Canada, the UK, Germany, Israel, and Russia) on March 19th.

Tonight on TLC, Sorority Girls premieres at 9pm ET/PT. The show will be about five Sorority Sisters who attempt to establish a sorority in Britain, a country that doesn't have the 200+ year history of these fraternal groups.

Bravo's Shahs of Sunset begins on Sunday, March 11th. It's a documentary series that looks at the lives of six thirty-something Persian-Americans living in Los Angeles.

History has a new fishing show coming February 9th: Mudcats, where some folks in Oklahoma catch giant catfish with their hands.

CBS will continue hosting the Academy of Country Music Awards through 2021.

HBO's Eastbound & Down will be back on Sunday, February 19th at 10pm ET/PT.

If you don't want to watch the Super Bowl, ABCFamily is going to air the five Bring It On films, beginning at 9am. Amusingly, they're not showing them in order.

HBO's Luck has already been renewed... mere days after its premiere.

It's a good thing that America's Most Wanted got back on the air after all... four fugitives were put behind bars in one week!


Cast & Plot Updates:
Lea Michele will be a guest mentor on the first episode of the second season of The Glee Project, which airs this summer on Oxygen.

Kristin Chenoweth will appear in a May episode of Hot in Cleveland.

Amber from 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom has struck a plea deal in response to her latest drug arrest - she'll complete a court-mandated drug rehabilitation program instead of going to jail for five years. She plead guilty to one count of "possession of a controlled substance" and one count of "probation violation." The hearing will be February 6th.

Leah from 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom 2 had a miscarriage.

Steve Jones will not be hosting The X-Factor anymore.

Shows in Development & Other Fun Stuff:
If you want to be in Los Angeles for the Simpsons 500th Episode Party (Monday, February 13th), you can enter until 5:59pm PT on Monday, February 6th over here.

Ben Stiller and Alan Alda may star in a new HBO comedy called All Talk, which is planned to be "politically, religiously, culturally, intellectually and sexually irreverent." The show will focus on the life of a Jewish family in Washington, DC.

The CW picked up three pilots - a "time-travel musical" called Joey Dakota, a comedy set in a New England summer resort called Shelter, and a futuristic "Hunger Games meets The Bachelor" called The Selection.

NBC bought TEN pilots last week, eight of which were comedies.

ABC has ordered a pilot based on Beauty and the Beast, despite the fact that the CW has already done the same.

I'd be surprised if you hadn't heard this one yet, but here ya go - Pat Sajak admitted to hosting the show after having a few drinks ("two or three or six") years ago.

Netflix is no longer marketing the DVD-by-mail part of its service, was they "expect DVD subscribers to decline each quarter forever," which is sad, since most brick-and-mortar video rentals are gone now. They also won't be adding video games like they had once intended.

If you're a fan of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic, which runs on The Hub, get excited - you will be able to vote for the episodes for a mare-a-thon which will run on Saturday, February 11th and Tuesday, February 14th. Go vote!

As one might expect, visitors to Alcatraz Island are already creeping off the main paths to look for secret rooms. The island has posted signs, reminding tourists that Alcatraz is a fictional television show.

Can't get enough of Dearborn, Michigan after watching All-American Muslim? Well, Lifetime is coming up with ANOTHER sequel to Dance Moms... Ice Moms, which will have six episodes to start.

President Obama is a big fan of Showtime's Homeland, as is Bill Clinton and Diane Sawyer

CBS picked up three drama pilots: a period show, a PI show (Applebaum), and a character-driven procedural (Quean). They also ordered a pilot for a sitcom, written by Louis C. K. and Spike Feresten, who wrote Boomtown together ten years ago.

USA is working on The Moment, which is a nine-episode original reality series where football star Kurt Warner gives people a "second chance at reclaiming the career dreams that they put on hold when their lives took an unexpected turn." Each week, someone will have the shot to pick-up an old career where they left off, thanks to great mentors and opportunities. The someones are secretly nominated by loved ones. [USA Network Press Release]

USA picked up Political Animals, a six-hour drama series, to air this summer. It looks like it'll focus on a fictional former first family. Yep, try saying that five times fast!

USA will also be calling this February "Characters Unite Month" for the second year in a row. The goal is to combat prejudice and discrimination, which are problems everywhere. For examples of what they're doing, read here.

TLC is developing Preacher Wives, to be a "candid look into the holy worlds of outspoken ladies who work to ensure that their churches run as smooth as Southern-churned butter."

ABC is turning Scruples, Judith Krantz's 1978 best-selling novel into a one-hour drama.

The city of Hoboken will not allow Jersey Shore to film a spin-off there.

The Simpsons: The History of a Rag

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Yes, seriously. We were treated to a horrid episode made up of a bunch of shorts that told the life story of the bar rag at Moe's Tavern. The rag itself told the story. To nobody in particular. We crossed the globe through centuries, from Medieval France to Mount Everest to Springfield. We see bits of the rag (once part of a tapestry) being utilized in a bunch of ways by many people... ending its story by being a companion to a dog. And that's all I'm going to say, as I don't want to promote this episode at all.

The Simpsons "Moe Goes from Rags to Riches" (S23E12): [haha about the space shuttle for sale.] The couch gag has the family going through several old sets as old characters from shows like Cheers and The Brady Bunch. [haven't we seen the Simpson family as the Bradys before?]

The town is having a meeting at Moe's, since City Hall is being fumigated. [ahh on "sangre de los muertos" - on the fly, I believe that's "the blood of the dead" !!] Everyone starts making fun of Moe for only having one friend: his bar rag. This starts the story of the the bar rag...

CR: FOX

In olden France, Burns (a Duke) commissions Marge to make a tapestry of his life story... she has 25 years to do so. [guess he wants it to be realllly long...] She works ceaselessly, but it's not what he expected, as she was possessed by the "demon wool" and ended up weaving futuristic scenes into the story. [that whole "demon sheep produce demon wool" thing was weird.] So, he burns down their home and rides off. But, he ends up accidentally hanging himself with it. [karma!] Next thing you know, we're in Persia and Nelson keeps casting aside wives. When Lisa is brought to him, she tells him a story for 1,001 nights... each night, she frees some of the women that he cast aside. [this show hasn't done 1,001 Nights before??] In the end, the women kill Nelson's guards, then him. Moving on, we see a famous ceiling being painted with part of the rag, someone is beheaded on the rag, and part being made into a confederate flag. Speeding right along, when the rag travels to mount Everest, a yeti takes it and uses it to comfort his "son," Moe. [now, I haven't seen about half of the Simpsons canon, so I might not be in the know... but are we supposed to know that Moe was raised in the mountains by a yeti...?]

Moe wakes up in the tavern without his beloved rag, freaking out. Turns out, Marge took it to wash. [still weird. though it was funny to hear that use of "ripe" again.] He's thrilled to get it back, but he casts is aside when the Simpson family tells him that they'e all his friends. [what? ridiculous.] Santa's Little Helper picks it up sleeps with it. The End.

Also, there's a random other storyline going on with Bart and Milhouse. Bart throws rocks at Milhouse's window, ending up getting one in his mouth. Our favorite underachiever tries hard to get Milhouse to be his friend again, particularly without changing anything. In the end, all is well anyway. [no idea what was going on here or why they needed this. I'm not even going to try to speculate.]

Archer - "El Contador"

by Jonathan Bredemeyer

Issues, issues... ISIS was more fun before the government budget cuts...

FX

Archer "El Contador" (S03E05): Opening in a meeting with the ISIS staff about not having enough agents, Mallory promotes Cyril to a field agent. After some great Stargate references and talk of a dead hooker, Ray is demoted and leaves in his electric wheelchair. The new mission is competing as bounty hunters, since the government's budget is gone. The bounty is a drug dealer hiding in a jungle, which excites Cyril. Mallory also orders Pam to give everyone drug tests... ironic since she is currently smoking a joint and pretending to be beat-boxing (versus last week's freestyling?) over the phone to cover her coughing.

Pam, Cheryl, and Ray are discussing their various levels of screwed by the upcoming drug test when Krieger walks up with a panacea to remove all traces of any drug from their systems.  Everyone coughs up $100 each to take it, and choke down the drug-masking cure in tea form, hating it in every physical sense possible. Well, the cure turns out to be a clinical trial of his drug, and he watches his three coworkers hallucinate and destroy a bathroom. The next morning, it turns out two of guinea pigs have spent the night in the bathroom, but Pam is AWOL.

The mission begins on the jungle floor with Archer and Lana dressed in their usual agent black, but Cyril looks like Indiana Jones, or "the ghost of Teddy Roosevelt," in Archer's opinion. Cyril reviews the dossier of the drug dealers as Lana and Archer remove claymore mines. As Archer attempts to explain some 'agenting' techniques about being in a hostile environment, Cyril disappears. Proceeding on with the mission to capture or kill the drug dealer Calzado, Archer hears a tiger and gets them captured... but not before betting Lana that he heard a tiger, since she claims there are no tigers in South America.

Lana and Archer come face to face with Calzado, who offers them $2 million to go away. Archer jumps at this, but, of course, it's a joke. Calzado then introduces El Contador, the account who wouldn't like it if Calzado wasted money paying off bounty hunters. El Contador turns out to be Cyril.

In the drug dealer's prison, Lana and Archer find them next to a tiger...  Cyril shows up and explains how he fell off the trail and then bluffed his way into being Calzado's accountant. Calzado interrupts to explain that tomorrow morning, bored from hunting animals (which he proves by shooting a Bengal tiger on the spot), he'll be hunting the most dangerous game in the world: Lana and Archer. Lana expects Archer to ask for sex, but apparently seeing a tiger get murdered turns him off.

The next morning, in the jungle, Cyril and Lana meet up and strategize to meet up with Archer before Calzado gets him. In the meantime, Archer is suckered into a trap by a bottle of tequila. Calzado shows up to 'gut him like a fish,' and Cyril and Lana get the drop on him. Cyril tries giving Lana orders, but she lets Calzado beat him up first.

At the ISIS office, Mallory can't collect the reward from the DEA because the trio didn't get a receipt from them when they dropped off Calzado. Pam runs by in her underwear with Krieger following with a tranquilizer gun. Ray electrically wheels in wearing underwear and carrying a naked Cheryl (wearing a cardboard tube top) who places the urine samples on Mallory's desk before threatening to burn down the building if anything comes of the drug tests. Archer has time to express his excitement over meeting a tiger... before watching it be murdered.

Memorable Lines from the Episode: 
Cheryl: "Oh God, it tastes worse that it smells."
Pam: "If I had a nickle for every time I've heard that... I'd have 8 nickles."

Calzado: "...hunt the most dangerous game in the world."
Archer: "Jai Alai?"

Let's Make a Deal!

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Hey! Remember that we were doing Game Show spotlights on Monday for the longest time? Well, we haven't posted one in about five months, but we have three last installments that have been sitting around, waiting for the light of day. So, we're going to post them over the course of the next month to wrap up that series. We apologize for the long delay, but if you've been stopping by you've probably noticed that we doubled the number of posts we do last August, and it's been pretty steady ever since. Please enjoy the remaining game shows in our series spotlight!
- - -
When I was a young girl, my mother and grandmother would joke about their large handbags - how they needed to have everything on hand, though they didn't carry hard-boiled eggs.They claimed that they needed to have so many things available at any time, so that they'd have them if they needed, or if someone else was in need. Plus, they might someday fall into favor with someone or win a prize for having all sorts of random items available at a moment's notice (that is, if they could find them in those large pocketbooks... but that's a different story), which is an idea that stems from Let's Make a Deal.

letsmakeadeal.com

Brief history: The original Let's Make a Deal was a daytime show that ran from 1963-1976, on both ABC and NBC affiliates. An evening syndicated version aired from 1971-1977. By 1974, the show was ridiculously popular, and the wait-time for a ticket to be in the studio audience was often more than two years! The show returned for the 1980-1981 season, via a Canadian-based revival, then was re-branded as The All New Let's Make a Deal for 1984-1986. NBC played with another daytime adaptation from 1990 to 1991 and for three episodes in 2003. In Fall 2009, yet another version appeared, this time on CBS. It is still running in syndication, and is notably one of the few CBS shows to be broadcast solely in standard definition. More than ten other countries have seen the show, with Greece, Poland, and Indonesia still making episodes. I was rather surprised to learn that they were still producing new episodes, but apparently the show is still pretty popular - there are slot machines, lottery tickets, a new-in-2010 board game, and a DVD game, in addition to the home games of years ago. 

The game: The basic idea of this show is to be an audience member and hope that the host picks you to be a "trader." The show became synonymous with audience members wearing ridiculous costumes, in hopes that they would be more likely to be noticed and selected. Couples could also be chosen to participate. There are a variety of games, but basically, you're offered a prize and you can either take it or trade it for an unknown prize (kinda like "door number 1, 2, or 3?"). The prizes ranged from cash, cars, and televisions to trips, furs, and "zonks," which encompassed items that were generally useless, crazy, or of a very low value.

CBS

There are also games that are pure luck/chance, such as "choose one of these three keys, hoping it unlocks that door," "flip some cards and hope that a certain total sum is reached within a certain number of cards," and rolling dice. There are a few games that require some skill, however, such as "is $x.xx the price of A or B?" and "what year was ___ introduced to the US market?"

The "final round" of the game is called "The Big Deal." The player who won the most money/stuff so far is asked first if they'd like to give it all up to try for The Big Deal. If that person declines, each other player is asked in order of greatest earnings to least. It's the "door number 1, 2, or 3?" thing all over, but this time one of the door is guaranteed to reveal a higher-valued prize than anything else seen all game. Trouble is, it's still a gamble which you'll choose, and you could wind up with much less than you had already won.

letsmakeadeal.com

At the end of the show, the host does "fast deals" (or "quick deals"), which is along the lines of the hard-boiled egg joke I referenced earlier. The host asks the audience to come up with a certain item and they can be rewarded for it. Sometimes it is something like a hard-boiled egg, other times it would be a dollar bill with a certain number on it, etc.

Notable changes to the way the game is played: Since we've come a long way in the past forty years, two major changes to the game are the prizes (when's the last time you saw a fur coat given away on television?) and the use of technology. Regarding the latter, CBS uses twitter to suggest items that audience members may want to carry with them to tapings of the show. There have also been several game aspects that were short-lived, such as the addition of "The Super Deal" after "The Big Deal,"  which was offered to Big Deal winners during the 1975-1976 season. You could go again on "Door 1, 2, or 3?" to have a shot at up to $30,000 in cash and prizes. At least here, though, you wouldn't walk away with nothing - if you chose to play and lost, you'd receive a consolation prize of at least one thousand dollars. Also, from 1984 to 1986, "Door Number 4" was commonly played, where the "trader" would spin a 20-section wheel to try and win money. If, after your first spin, you thought that you could win more, you could spin again... but a lower amount would negate any winnings at all.

Special contestants: Lance Bass and Leslie Nielsen both played Let's Make a Deal as part of Gameshow Marathon during the summer of 2006. Otherwise, I'm struggling to find any history of celebrities and special guests appearing on the show as traders.

Favorite Rounds: I'll have to say that "Fast Deals" are the most interesting to me, since the "chance" factor is a bit removed, making it less stressful and more interesting to watch. Though I must admit... my favorite thing about the show isn't any of the rounds - it's seeing what the audience is wearing! You can see some outlandish outfits in the background of this clip, but I chose this one primarily for the fact that you get a chance to see how many decisions you might have to make and what the variance in prize possibilities (in today's game) are.



My take: I'd go to a taping because it would be neat, but it's not really my type of game. I struggle a great deal with having to choose one mystery thing over another, and then agonize later over what influenced my choice and if I should have chosen differently. Plus, although I've done well at bridal showers and Mary Kay parties with games like "who has ___ in their purse," I don't think I'd excel here - I don't like a cluttered purse and I'd probably try to come up with too many things that they might possibly ask for, thus weighing me down.

Do you (or did you) ever watch Let's Make a Deal? Did you see more than one version of it, or just the newest one? What would you do to make yourself noticeable?

Cupcake Plunger Giveaway Winner!

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Last week we held a contest to give away a cupcake plunger, to celebrate Cake Boss: The Next Great Baker wrapping up. (The finale is tonight!) Thank you to everyone who participated in the giveaway, especially those who followed the instructions.

We had quite a few illegal entries (mostly people claiming that they left a blog comment when they did not, but several who claimed they followed @TheTalkingBox on twitter when they're not as well), which I'm sad to say turned me off to having a Rafflecopter widget. As longtime readers know, we normally just take blog comments as "entries" and have random.org select the winners. (we have also counted "Facebook Likes" one one or two occasions in the past as well.) Random.org was still used through the Rafflecopter system, but it took me about half an hour to figure out which entries were falsified (more than ten were!). So, I may shelf the idea of using such a system. While it made it nice for you guys to enter multiple ways (and a big THANK YOU to the three or four people who earned the maximum number of entries!), it would have been a much larger nightmare if we had received a greater response to this giveaway (like we did with the NCIS: LA shirt!).

Anyway, special congrats to Jessica F. (jwfong in the comments) for winning the cupcake plunger! We have contacted her and look forward to getting out her prize! Thank you again to everyone who participated and we hope that you'll come back for future giveaways and to read other articles that might interest you!

The Exes: Another Holly/Phil Episode...

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

TVLand

Did anyone else think of the play-on-words of "When Holly Broke Kevin" to "When Harry Met Sally" as being a funny riff on 3rd Rock from the Sun, where Kristen Johnston's character's name was Sally and her "brother" was Harry? Okay, it was a bit of a stretch, but still. I took a separate issue with the title of the episode giving away everything that was going to happen - it may have been punnyfunny, but at the expense of the plot. Also, is it just me or are they struggling to give all of the characters decent air time nearly every episode? It's a cast of FIVE, guys. I'd be happy if we could get the core four (sorry, Eden) more than three minutes each here. Haskell and Stuart seem to suffer the most. Maybe the show feels that they can get away with it because Stuart had such a large role in the opening few episodes of the series? I'm not sure, but this most certainly needs to be addressed if a renewal is going to happen. Agreed?

The Exes "When Holly Broke Kevin" (S01E09): Phil brings a basketball client to the apartment, and Haskell immediately bombards him with memorabilia to sign, hoping to sell it on eBay, no doubt. [I liked the nefarious "I just need a sample."] Phil tells Haskell that the guy, Kevin, is just there to relax. Enter Holly. There's instant attraction, and Holly is given the "girlfriend's seat" at the game that night. Well, as you might imagine, Kevin goes home with Holly afterward, which makes Phil paranoid that something will happen to Kevin. [why? how crazy would they be on a first date?] In respect for Phil, Holly tells Kevin that she wants to take it slow... but after he puts a hand on her knee, they start making out like a couple of teenagers. [...yeah....] Eden comes over the next morning to find out why Holly isn't at work, and she realizes that Holly's had sex. She meets Kevin on his way out, then heads to the office to spread the news. [hahaha. I kinda love it. but I also kinda hate it. Is Holly angling to be the office wh0re?] That night, Kevin doesn't play too well, mostly because he's rather out of it and lethargic. So, being a conscientious agent, Phil tells Holly that she can't see Kevin during the season After a few double entendres, Holly agrees not to have sex with Kevin for a while. [I thought that the jokes were pretty good.] But, when Kevin comes over and they struggle to find anything to talk about, they wind up in the bedroom. [yep. Phil should have seen this coming!] Kevin ends up hurting his back so badly that the paramedics are called. [oops!] Kevin tells Holly to call Phil and tell him what happened... she tells him in person, but there's not much time for a reaction because Phil runs out toward the hospital. Later, when Holly goes to apologize to Phil, she finds out that, thanks to chiropractics and cortisone, Kevin is playing anyway. [wow, what a comeback! He's going to be hurting later...] Of course, the paramedic is now in the girlfriend seat, but Holly doesn't really get too upset about it. [amazingly. she's had a tendency to overreact all season, don't you think?]

Where was Stuart all episode? Well, Haskell kinda had a hold on him. See, Haskell bet on the first game of the episode and made $45. He wants to win more, but can't without more money to gamble with. So, he convinces Stuart to bet on the second game. They end up losing (that's the one where Kevin is lethargic), and Stuart complains that Haskell told him it was a "sure thing." [whine, whine, whine!] When they hear about how injured Kevin is, Haskell decides to bet on the other team, convincing Stuart to go along with it. Of course, Kevin ends up playing and the game is a blow-out, which the guys don't hear about until they're drinking expensive cognac at the bar. [funny and sucky.]

Hot in Cleveland: Not Good Enough

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

It's rough to not be "good enough" for something. Whether it's the first time you didn't make a sports team, or when your significant other calls it quits, or you don't get your dream job after doing two rounds of interviews, being "not good enough" is a fact of life. In this episode of Hot in Cleveland, we see a lot of this. Melanie doesn't think that Emmy is good enough for her son. Victoria doesn't think that Will is good enough for her daughter. Emmy realizes that Will isn't good enough for her. Joy doesn't think that she's good enough to date a young guy, so she spends a week lying to him, only to lose him in the end anyway. I think that Will was probably hurting more than was shown, since he seemed to be truly happy with Emmy as a wife... until they talked about how things would be beyond the next year. And, while Victoria's worries were selfish and elitist, Melanie was deeply concerned for her son's happiness. When it comes down to it, it's true - you may not be good enough for something, no matter what you do. But, you're good enough for something else... you just have to find it. (and, yeah, feel free to substitute "someone" for "something" should that be your mindset.)

Hot in Cleveland "Love is Blind" (S03E09): Victoria announces that her daughter is coming to Cleveland with her fiance, who she assumes is A-Rod, from the Yankees. Well, when Emmy arrives, her fiance is none other than Will, Melanie's son. Both moms are a bit thrown - Victoria upset that her daughter has fallen for a non-famous person, Melanie bothered by the fact that Emmy isn't too nice to Will.

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[oh my goodness! If it weren't for the promos, I would've been completely caught off-guard as well!] So, the ladies decide to meddle/mother the couple apart. When talking to their own children doesn't work, they switch. [sure. why not? I wouldn't think my soon-to-be mother-in-law hated me.... uh huh....] Melanie points out that Emmy has been engaged a bunch of times (likely 12, given the numbers that it's divisible by 2, 3, AND 4...), but she claims that it's different this time. Victoria lies to Will, telling him that Emmy will lose the brilliance of her breasts when she turns 30. [quick laugh at, "you know, Google doesn't know everything."] Emmy mentions that she can make Will visit Melanie more, and she likes the sound of that. Plus, Will compliments Victoria, which wins her over. So, the women decide to embrace the idea of becoming family... right up until it's time to talk about the wedding, grandchildren, and the future. Mere minutes later, Emmy calls it off. [meh. worth watching again, but not annually. also, the joke about having a "bald, crying, bundle of Joy" was weak.]

Oh. Joy. Yeah, so let's get some background on why she's bald and crying... Joy hits on a young guy (age 22), and when she learns that he's blind, pretends to be 26. They go out a few times, and she's enjoying not having to "do herself up" to date him, though she does try out some humorous Harry Potter references and some youthful slang. [I thought that this was going quite well. And rather akin to the old man she was dating a few episodes back.] Unfortunately, things change when he plans to take part in an experimental procedure to restore his sight... immediately! Joy panics, trying to figure out how to look like she's 26 years old. [I had to pause so I could stop laughing at the idea that "the government should be paying them not to work just so they can have sex with all of the women."] Victoria suggests a place that uses acid to re-do faces, and she goes. [girl is clearly crazy.] Well, her face remains unchanged, but her hair is falling out in clumps! Wait, wait, it gets worse... When the young guy (able to see) comes to the house, he mistakes Emmy for Joy, so she throws on the accent and goes for it. [!! shock!! but then again, not really.] Joy comes in, sees what's going on, and plays the role of "Joy's mother." [this I don't understand... isn't it a bit of a stretch for Joy's character to go along with this?]

Where was Elka all this time? Well, talking to A-Rod. She got from Emmy and begins messing with him, only to have her plan backfire when he starts bothering her and won't shut up. [haha] Late in the show, when A-Rod calls the house, Joy answers... saddened by how her "relationship" ended, she starts talking to him. [please hope this is not ongoing...]

Teen Mom 2: Moves, Lawyers, Fights, Jobs

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Is it just me or is it hard to believe that this season of Teen Mom 2 is almost over already. Similarly, is it just me or does everyone agree that little-to-nothing even happened this season? I mean, let's look at it - Isaac turned one, Kailyn got her own place, and she files for child support. That's really about it. Jenelle and Kieffer fought, broke up, got back together. She got kicked out of her mom's house, moved back in, moved out voluntarily, then moved back in again. Maybe it sounds like a lot, but it's really the same ol', same ol' with her. It gets even worse from there... Chelsea got back with Adam but he dumped her, she moved to a new place, and she got a job. The first part is pointless, the second point hardly matters, but great on the third part. Corey wants a change in careers, Leah gets a full-time job but ends up only working one day a week, and Ali doesn't have MRI problems or a known genetic disorder. For them, this is basically just an update, not a season of stuff. Am I being too hard on the show?

Teen Mom 2 "The Beginning of the End" (S02E09):
Leah: They go to look at some land where they could put a new trailer. It's $5,000, and closer to town, schools, and doctors. [sounds like a big improvement.] Corey likes it, so Leah goes to her mom's house to use the internet and look for a mobile home. [moving ahead, good idea.] But, Corey then tells her that he's been thinking and decides that he doesn't want to move right now - they can save more money where they are now. [it IS a good point.] Corey talks about getting a new truck now and a house later. [not the worst idea, until we learn some more...] Leah mentions that they had made this decision together, and asks why is he going back on that, but he just says that this was his thought process. Leah's friend helps her bathe them in a tub that's downstairs, cold, and doesn't really have a proper faucet. [it also looks like an accident waiting to happen... as soon as the girls are slightly more independent!] Leah has lunch with her mom and stepdad while Corey takes the girls to his mom's. Leah talks about Corey's priorities, and it comes out that Corey has only had this truck for like four months. [well, now they're not living in a safe environment AND there seems to be no reason to upgrade the vehicle.] Her stepdad says that he'll help her find a place to live. So reasonably, she tries to reason with Corey, telling him about the problems around the house and whatnot, but it comes down to her telling him that she's going to move, whether he comes or not. [wow... look at her taking charge! It's impressive though that she might leave him over this.]

Photo by MTV

Kailyn: her semester is going well. [remember? she's the only one on this show who is working on her education.] She gets a copy of the letter Jo wrote that says why he doesn't think he should pay $488/month in child support. Kailyn calls Jo to ask him why he's appealing the child support order, and he says that it's too high, she should get a better-paying job, and won't even tell her if he's getting a lawyer. [I don't know that the better-paying job would make that much of a difference... Jo would still pay quite a bit.] She meets with a lawyer who tells her that Jo's amount is 63% of what was determined as the cost to raise Isaac. She suggests that Jo would try to go for "downward deviation," claiming that he can't afford it, that he gave her some support already, and that she needs to work harder. But, the lawyer sees no grounds for these things. [does the fact that he supported her in the past factor in at all?] Kailyn pays a $350 retainer and now she has a lawyer.

Chelsea: she hasn't started studying for GED. [still. I've got nothing... her mom clearly will watch Aubree whenever. Her dad seems more than willing to help on weekends. how has she not gotten to study AT ALL yet?] Adam broke up with her, so she complains to her mom that Adam "just doesn't like me anymore." [cry me a river.] Her mom basically tells her to move on. Similarly, when she complains to her dad that all she can think about is Adam, he doesn't know what to tell her, as he's said it all before. [girl. you're not in the 8th grade. get over it.] Chelsea starts her job, and her mom picks up Aubree... and we learn that Chelsea puts lipgloss on her one-year-old. [that can't be good.] She puts on her uniform, clocks in, then starts filling out paperwork. She learns how to check-in people and how to clean the tanning beds. She'll work at least 15 hours a week.

Jenelle: Barbara and Jenelle go to social services and Jenelle is ordered to start paying $30/week in child support. [really? Jenelle asks her mom to turn off the windshield wipers when it's visibly raining out?] Jenelle complains that she hasn't slept in two days, and Barbara reminds her that Kieffer just isn't good for her, which, of course, makes her yell for a moment. See, Jenelle heard that Kieffer has been talking to other girls, and things only get worse when he won't tell Jenelle who he's texting. She actually drives off to a random location and leaves him there. [I don't know that this girl thinks. ever.] She goes home to complain to her roommate, and Kieffer shows up at her place to get his stuff. [why does she immediately have to complain?] Kieffer shows Jenelle his phone, and it was his ex-girlfriend whom he was texting. Jenelle and Kieffer get into a fight, and she slams some doors while crying about how nobody cares about her. [if she wasn't currently living in a different location, they pretty much could have used stock footage for this.] Oh, but Jenelle finds even more to be angry about... one of her housemates has had friends over all afternoon. [...what's so wrong with that again?] Jenelle then argues with Tori and says that she's going to move out, since she's not getting money for groceries and stuff. [how did Jenelle even get money to front for such things?] Jenelle goes into Tori's room and demands her clothes back. Tori asks Jenelle to leave the room, but she won't. Well, they get into an all-out girl-on-girl fight... and then the boys do, too. When it ends, Jenelle just yells about how everyone needs to leave her alone. [sound familiar?]

Teen Mom 2 "A Closer Look" (Special): not much was actually revealed in this thirty-minute presentation, so don't get your hopes up.

Chelsea: Just why can't she move on from Adam? She takes everything personally and wants to know what Adam doesn't like about her so that she can become the person that he's after. [really? you want to change into what he'll like? GET OVER IT.] She doesn't want Aubree to have a stepmother figure. [not only does she cling to the past, she's completely against the future. not a good sign.] Chelsea says that it's a misconception that she's a pushover - that only happens around Adam. [thanks for clearing that up, because you do indeed seem fairly useless in society.]

Jenelle: She says that living with Tori and Tori's boyfriend was like living in a frat house and it wasn't a good thing. She had never previously been in a physical fight with Tori. She says that it's a misconception that she's a bad-@$$ and hard to get along with. [...really?]

Leah: Corey has never bathed the kids downstairs. [wow. NEVER??] Leah says that the idea that she's a "cheating whore" is incorrect.

Kailyn: She's quit the job she had working with Jordan. [well, that's new.] She feels that Jo didn't tell her if he had a lawyer so she'd spend the money to get one, sabotaging her. [at first I thought that this was a bit of a stretch, but then I thought about it... it could be just the sort of thing that Jo would do!]

Alcatraz: To Be an Expert

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

So between last week and this week, I got to thinking. For Doc Soto, this is a really cool thing. He was working in his comic book shop and creating stories of his own, but then this giant opportunity comes along to put his knowledge into practice. He's written four books on a niche subject (Alcatraz), so he's uniquely qualified to serve as a historian of sorts. And, as pointed out in this episode, an expert spends 10,000 hours on a subject, and Doc has likely spent twice that on studying Alcatraz. Well, if you were offered the opportunity to serve as an "expert" on something, what would it be for? Why would you be called into such a service? For me, I'm not sure. The most likely answer is The Rocky Horror Show, as that's what my Master's thesis was about. But I haven't gone to the event a hundred or a thousand times like some people have, so I am not the most knowledgeable person regarding the latest in shout-backs and the like. But, at the same time, perhaps I have a unique understanding of the script, having spent about 30 pages analyzing various things about it. And of the history behind the show's various productions, which took up another large chunk of the paper. And then there's the evolution of the extra-textual material, probably my favorite part of my Rocky Horror studies. Oh, and that whole third of the project that was devoted to the process of producing the show and analyzing audience members' reactions to it. I didn't hit 10,000 hours (which is the equivalent of spending 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, for 5 years), but I can't think of anything else that would rival the amount of time I spent studying Rocky Horror. What have you spent the most time studying? 

Alcatraz "Kit Nelson" (S01E03): In Walnut Creek (CA), a guy carries a flower and uses a key to enter a home. He turns off a lamp, then goes upstairs and wakes a sleeping child, abducting him. [creepy topic for such an early episode, no? or is that where we're going with this show?] The next day, the guy (Kit Nelson) takes the kid (Dylan) fishing, using poles that he stole from a hardware store. They rent a boat, and Kit soon has both of them in the water. He asks Dylan to hold him underwater as long as possible, which he does reluctantly. However, then they switch positions, but we don't see it. [thank goodness. I think that this would have freaked me out!] They then head to the movies, where the guy makes the kid eat popcorn. They go to have pie, and we find out that Kit takes his victims to do things that his brother used to like to do. Then, they head to a bomb shelter to play checkers. Dylan asks to go home, and soon takes off a shoe, throws it at a lightbulb, climbs up the hatch, and makes a run for it.

Now that you know the crime and what the criminal does, let's look at his past. In 1960, there was a a fight in the Alcatraz recreation yard. Kit is beat up because the other inmates don't like that he beat up kids. [I had never thought about how other inmates might dislike you because of why you're locked up. yeah, perverts don't bode well for most!] The doctor offers Kit a cigarette, but he doesn't take it. He's then abused a bit by the doctor. When his father comes to visit, he says that his mother died and left a dried chrysanthemum. But, before she passed, she told his dad that Kit killed his brother when they were children, and she had covered it up by saying that the boy died of scarlet fever. [I wonder if this show is just going to end up being too much for me, emotionally...] Kit is brought to solitary confinement, where the warden talks to him by matchlight, demanding to know what Kit did to his brother. [well this doesn't seem legal...] He's threatened that he'll have to stay in solitary if he doesn't admit what he did to his brother, so he comes clean, saying that he strangled his brother, that he liked it, and that he knew he had to do it again. The flowers were a favorite of his mother and brother, and that's why it became what he left with the bodies. The warden leaves Kit in solitary anyway. [the whole idea of being in a dark room 24/7 disturbs me. maybe that's part of the reason I take issue with a show half-set in a prison!]

Now, let's look at how our heroes manage to catch their culprit. We see Doc drawing a comic book about his experiences when he hears about the 11-year-old missing boy on a police scanner. He grabs a file and runs out to bring it to Madsen, who is with Hauser, checking on the state of Lucy. This criminal's pattern is to kidnap a boy on a Friday night, then return his body on Sunday night. Madsen and Doc go the house of the missing boy and show the mother and brother a photo of Kit Nelson, whom they recognize as a guy from the hardware store. They go to the hardware store, where they find out that a uniform was stolen along with the fishing poles, so they ask where someone would go fishing around there. [this is starting off like a wild goose chase, no?] When they reach the Lafayette recreation area, Kit and Dylan are already gone, so they head back to the boy's house. They ask his mother about what Dylan liked to do, but they don't match up with what the duo is doing. Doc is working on cracking the pattern when they find out that Hauser canceled the Amber Alert on Dylan. It seems that Hauser is more interested in catching the criminal than keeping the kid alive, and if there are no cops around the house, they'll just grab him when he goes to return the body on Sunday. Doc, of course, is upset that the boy will be dead by then, and heads off to try the cherry pie at every diner in town. [he apparently either remembered that Kit liked pie or that it was a link in the other old cases or something.] Hauser isn't sure that Doc is needed, but Madsen convinces him that Doc can make more out of the clues than they can.

Cr: Liane Hentscher/FOX

Well, by the fifth diner, Doc finds Kit and Dylan, and tries to stall them while Madsen is en route. It's clear that he doesn't know what he's doing, however, and by the time Madsen arrives, Kit pulls a gun and threatens to kill the boy, only letting up when Madsen and Doc are handcuffed to a dumpster, without a gun, keys, or a phone. Back at Alcatraz, Doc goes through the boxes and finds that Kit had some really expensive cigarettes... they find his commissary account and look up where the money came from - he used to build bomb shelters, and that's where he hides with the kids. [time out. I just want to say that Alcatraz is a PAIN to get to, and Walnut Creek is nowhere near there. We're talking about a 40-minute drive PLUS a ferry ride. I realize that they can't set all of the crimes in San Francisco, but I think that this is going to become a problem sooner than later.] They head to the only bomb shelter in Walnut Creek and arrive to hear the boy screaming in the woods. They find him and Hauser shoots the assailant, who, by then, had caught up to the boy.

So, that's the story in this episode. But, before we leave it, let's look at a few other things. For instance, Hauser apparently knows more about Doc's background than Madsen. Hauser confronts Doc about having "arrested development" (when you face a trauma as a child and get caught up in being that age, not growing past it), but he needs to move beyond being eleven years old if he's going to be helpful on this team, regardless of the point that he is an "extreme expert" on Alcatraz. Doc agrees, but isn't able to muster up the courage to explain the situation to Madsen. [well, I'm dying to know!] He does, however, tell a little of the story to Dylan when he brings him three issues of a comic that the boy was missing from his collection: when he was eleven, he was kidnapped, and he got away. He goes on to say that, "once you know you can do that, it sort of gives you a superpower." [...and now we know why he is making a living being a comic book writer. very interesting!] 

But that's not even the most messed up part. Hauser brought Kit's body to his secret underground Alcatraz replica, where THE DOCTOR FROM THE ORIGINAL ALCATRAZ is working! [super-mega-creepy! ahhhhh!]

Switched at Birth: Your Own Projects

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I love how the storylines came together in such a way that so many of the characters (except for John, Melody, and Bay) had a side project going on. Kathryn had her book, Angelo and Regina had the salon, Daphne tried to bake cupcakes, Emmett tried to repair motorcycles, and Toby and Wilke tried to make a music video. Teamwork at its finest in some instances, which is great. However, it's not always enough. As we see, nobody is able to help out Emmett with his fine, and he's forced to sell his beloved motorcycle. And, with both he and Daphne (who lost her driving privileges for a month) out of wheels, I wonder how they'll be getting to school? And, speaking of wheels, we saw some nice glimpses of Bay's "Thing" again, which is fun. What's not fun? This creepy past of Angelo's! According to the scenes-from-the-next, though, it looks like we're closing in on learning what he's been up to!

Switched at Birth "Les Soeurs d'Estrees" (S01E14): Emmett has Daphne over to help him study for trigonometry, and she imagines them kissing. [you gotta admit, they did look totally cute together!] Melody comes home and lets Emmett know that the $5,000 fine is due in a week, and she doesn't have the money. He thinks that his dad will help out, but Melody suggests he sell his motorcycle, which his dad bought it for him for his 13th birthday and fixed it up with him. [that sucks. also, I guess we're not going to see a trial or anything? you can just press charges and a fine "happens" ??] Daphne thinks that she can sell 200 cupcakes at $5 each to help with the money. [um, girl. $5 each? It may be Buckner, but that's steep. Sprinkles doesn't even charge that.] Then, while Daphne is baking, Bay tells her that the tagging that Emmett did was a birthday present for her. [ooooh... I didn't realize that Daphne didn't know that yet!] Regina buys the first cupcake, then she sells some at Buckner, but she's not really getting anywhere. It doesn't help that Wilke tells her he doesn't even want to be friends anymore. [well, you know. she kinda acted like a tease.]

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A new lawyer comes over and says that there's no way the hospital will actually want to go to trial for the case, and they'll likely offer a new settlement anyway. [is that what the Kennishes want at this point, though?] Kathryn admits that she's writing a book, and is told to be careful with what she writes, since all of it will be admissible in court. [hmmm... so wait until after a legal battle to write it all down??] They then interview another (younger) lawyer, who thinks a memoir will be great, since it's moving testimony for a jury. Kathryn likes this guy, but John wants someone more experienced. [I wish we had more about what Kathryn liked about him.] They take a break from talking with attorneys for John to learn that the detective STILL can't find anything on Angelo for the missing two years. So, John goes to Angelo's to ask him what he's been up to, and Angelo talks about living with a wealthy woman in Chicago and working under the table. [something seems strange...] John fills in Angelo about how Regina found out that the girls were switched thirteen years ago and did nothing about it. This, as expected, blows Angelo's mind. [what room were John and Kathryn in when they poured drinks? They have a full bar in their house?] Angelo reacts by rushing over to Regina's and demanding to know why she never told him, then says he's done with her. [I wouldn't bet on it...]


This would have put a damper on the fact that Regina was going to have Angelo act as a silent business partner in the salon, but Angelo decides that Regina must have been doing what was best for the girls, and decides not to give up the "dream." This is, of course, aside from the fact that they're apparently still interested in one another romantically, since we see them kiss toward the end of the episode. [definitely not a good thing...] You know who else isn't a fan? Daphne. When Regina tells her that she's looking for a salon location, Daphne isn't really okay with Angelo being part of the project, but she doesn't want to be the reason that Regina isn't happy, so she says she's fine with it. [I thought it would have been nice for Regina's mother to comment on the whole situation..]

Bay and Daphne have been brainstorming about how they could get more money to give to Emmett, and Daphne comes up with a pretty good plan. She tells John and Kathryn that she lost her hearing aids, and they promptly write her a check for $5000. Plus, since she doesn't want to bother Regina, it'll be a secret. [awesome. love it.] But then she screws up when she mis-texts Regina instead of Emmett, and Regina then catches her in a couple of lies. [when you're doing something of this nature, Daphne, you need to come up with your lies AHEAD OF TIME. do better.] Daphne admits the truth, seemingly unable to come up with anything else plausible on the spot. Regina makes her give the money back right away, so she heads over to tell Kathryn (John isn't there). [if she already had the check cashed, why did she even go home? you'd have a much better shot at making this work by going directly to Emmett's afterwards!] She gives Kathryn the cash and apologizes, starting out with a lie about finding the hearing aids, but then admitting the real truth, which makes Kathryn not trust her. [I liked the idea of her sticking with the "I found them" bit, but I guess Regina would have found out.] Kathryn takes away Daphne's car keys for a month, then goes to Regina's to talk about it. This doesn't go too smoothly, since Regina tells Kathryn about the salon project. After leaving there, Kathryn then confronts Bay, thinking that she must have put Daphne up to that charade, and is hard-pressed to believe that Bay isn't all evil. [poor Bay. I hate it when mothers do that!] Clearly, Bay goes to Daphne to find out what went wrong with the plan, and then decides to try to convince Daphne to woo the money from Wilke. [not the best idea in the world, but it might work.] Daphne claims she doesn't want to manipulate him, but off they go to find the boys.

Now, before the girls actually get to the guys, let's look at what Toby and Wilke have been up to this episode. Still set on doing a music video with a capybara, Wilke gets costumes for the rodent, then gets Simone to be the director and camera person, since she has to do a project for a class anyway. [I'm not a fan of Simone. In fact, I don't really like her at all. But, it sure looks like she's going to be around for a while!] And, although she was once with Wilke, she's apparently now into Toby, and hits on him. Oh, and Toby is an amazing singer. Okay, now, when Bay and Daphne arrive at the taping, they point out how Emmett has helped the guys in the past, and they should help him now. Toby says that they've pretty much spent all the money already (though there's no sign of this expensive capybara until later...). The girls are left to tell Emmett that they couldn't come up with the money. He's forced to sell his bike for $4750, but he and Bay do take a last ride together. Oh, but in order for them to go for a ride, Daphne gets left alone... and she calls Wilke to give her a lift. [and I'm just going to sit here, shaking my head...] Another episode-ending scenario that's bound to change things? Emmett announced that he's going to be moving in with his father. [excitement! how will this impact EVERYTHING??]


And, we'll end back on the lawyer thing. So, the young guy tells a publishing friend about Kathryn's idea, and since it was well-received, he brings over a few other books so she could see what sorts of things they publish. [do you really start looking for a publisher before you have anything for them to read?] He reminds Kathryn and John that the other lawyer is going to get them money, but he'd make the hospital sorry for what they did, and this really hits home with John, who hired him. [I don't know a lot about hiring lawyers, but I'm not 100% sure that I would've went with this guy OR the other one we saw this episode. Though, I wouldn't want to interview every attorney in the metropolitan area, either.]

House: Gaining Freedom

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I didn't like Taub not being in this episode. I'm not sure exactly why it bothered me, but I guess I got used to having him in the episodes... at this point he's a little easier to relate to than Park, Adams, or Foreman. And, with the absence of Cuddy this season (who I found pretty easy to relate to), it's important to have some sort of character that seems realistic to a certain extent. And, speaking of ridiculous characters, can anyone see Melanie Lynskey as anyone other than Rose from Two and a Half Men these days? Don't get me wrong, I loved her as Lurlynn in Sweet Home Alabama, but I think that she's kinda "holed" as Rose these days. But here in House? I don't think that she really shined. Not that the patient or the case were all that memorable, either. The ongoing Foreman-House battle for power is getting old. Trying to give Chase's character some new depth via a sister ain't gonna do much. I think we all need to accept that this show is just about done. I'm seeing one more season at best, people. I wouldn't be surprised if FOX blows the whistle on the show any day now. The first eight episodes averaged 7.5M views each, but that's counting the season opener, which came in with 9.78M... since then, it's only gone over 7.55M twice - and once was for this episode, the first since November. We're looking at four more new episodes in the next four weeks... then another month-long hiatus. Anyone want to argue that these are good signs?

House "Better Half" (S08E09): A different doctor's patient, Andres, struggles to know where he is or what things are, but he's planning to start a drug trial for a new Alzheimer's medication. When he suddenly starts coughing up blood, he becomes a patient of the diagnostics department. Chase is fine with a family friend being in the room as they do tests, but Park kicks him out. [I imagine that this has got to be one of the tougher things about being a doctor... the regulations don't define "loved ones," as some of us do.] The patient gets violent toward his wife, then there's blood in his urine. [what's with Adams' neckpiece?]

Cr: Adam Taylor/FOX

Soon, he wanders out of the hospital, but Chase and Adams find him at a track field not far away. When the patient comes to after being frozen, he's speaking Portuguese, his native tongue. House can't go to the patient's house to check for toxins, and he can't make the team do it because Foreman overruled him, so he tries to talk to the patient's wife, but that doesn't really work. [really? nobody went to the house? that is so rare!] House was, however, able to translate about what her husband was talking about.

Meanwhile, House is petitioning to have his ankle monitor removed, thinking that he has concocted a great plan to convince Foreman to sign... [I don't know that I want House left to his own devices already... it's still just episode nine, folks. And, if you'll recall, House was in prison at the start of the season, so he hasn't been on "house arrest" all that long.] House has notecards taped to things with predictions of what Foreman will do. [slightly amusing. very character, tho.] Foreman can't control House, and that's the big push/concern. [why did Foreman ask where House's petition was if it was THE ONLY THING ON HIS DESK?] In the end, House is able to have his ankle monitor removed after all. [surprising. and probably a bad move.]

Also on Foreman's plate? The hospital is at risk of losing donors, as they have dropped in the rankings. Foreman says that the drop is due to the diagnostics department temporarily being shut down, but the donor believes that it may be more likely due to the change in management, and asks to see a five-year plan. This may spell trouble shortly. [I hate it when Foreman does things like House - like has an epiphany in the middle of a conversation and running off to check his suspicions.]

On to Wilson, who has an asexual patient. And, it might not be that much of a rarity - apparently, nearly 1% of the population identifies as such. [this interests me a little, but not enough to actually go do my own reading on the matter, LoL.] House bets Wilson $100 that there's something medically wrong with the patient that makes her not want to have sex. Wilson tells House that he can't contact the patient, but he can run tests on some already-drawn blood. Well, House gets around this by contacting the woman's husband, and they find out that he has a brain tumor that has stopped him from wanting sex. [wow. didn't know a brain tumor could do that.] The wife admits that she has had sex before, and that it's fun, so maybe they can "go through it" together. [awkward!]


Now, the final round-up. Taub wasn't in this episode because he was "taking time off for a sick daughter." Chase calls his sister for the first time in years. The most memorable thing said was, "most happiness is based on lies."

Cake Boss is Back! Buddy & Lisa's Vow Renewal

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I was a little surprised to see that this show was back on so soon. I figured that they'd wait until Cake Boss: The Next Great Baker was wrapped up (which is only two weeks away), but apparently not. I'm glad that they did an hour-long episode about the vow renewal, since there was a ton to see. There are certain things that I would have focused on differently, but I thought that it was a nice overview of the family vacation. I did have a couple glaring questions though... for instance, why in the world did Buddy want to make his vow renewal cake so ENORMOUS?!? I just couldn't figure that out - I mean, it's one thing to want something grand and stunning, but if you're going to throw away half of it, who's winning? Another thing, on at least two of the four cruises I've been on, there were strict regulations about not bringing flowers, plants, fruits, etc. back onto the ship, since there are concerns about non-native species being brought to other places. Maybe not all cruiselines enforce this? Regardless, this was a cute, memorable episode that I'd watch again.

Cake Boss "Cake Block, Cruise, & a Carlo's Ceremony" (S05E01): Buddy is working on coming up with a neat cake design for the vow renewal. They use styrofoam cakes to get a feel for it, since Buddy wants a combination of the original design with some newer stuff because he's learned a lot in ten years. [makes sense.] Buddy got some hints from Lisa about what they dress looks like so he can work some appropriate lace into the cake, and has has a new mold to make sugar lace. Problem is, it doesn't work well. Luckily, they found that baking it at 100 degrees for 15 minutes helps the lace come out of the molds, which helps. [this was interesting to me. I don't know that I'd want to go through the same tedious trouble, but it was interesting to learn about.] They're also doing tropical flowers and fondant seashells for the vow renewal cake because the ceremony is on the beach (but the reception will be on the ship). After the lace is on the cake, Buddy isn't thrilled with the look (he really struggled to see where the cake was going), so he just starts piping. [that cake is SO BIG!] Everything is going super until they drive the truck to Florida (the family is going out of Port Canaveral), and the humidity makes the flowers fall a bit. [awww!]

The gang is also doing a replica of the the Disney Dream for the ship's first anniversary of sailing. Mauro hasn't been on a ship since 1968, when he came over from Italy, other than "booze cruises."[wow... that cake looks AMAZING!] Everything goes smoothly with this cake until it comes time to present it at the event, and it's too large for the ship's elevators! Everyone has to carry the cake up several floors.

Now, on to the trip itself! The Valastros manage to pack 20 suitcases for their family alone - they're over-packers. [how would you know which piece of luggage was missing if one was?? I struggle when we bring three bags on a trip!] They board, take some photos, and then we see the family up on deck, on the slide, etc. The family makes a big deal of getting Mauro to go on the water slide, since he's a big fraidy-cat. They finally convince him to go on it, tho. We see the family at Animator's Palette for a meal, interacting with a computer-generated Crush from Finding Nemo. In Nassau, the women and kids take a bus to do some shopping while the guys go buy some fresh flowers to solve the sugar flower dilemma.

Phelan Ebenhack/DCL

The vow renewal is planned for the day that they're at Castaway Cay, and the ladies get their hair and nails done while the guys work on fixing the flowers on the cake. [I liked the original flowers better... just me?] While everyone's getting ready, clouds roll in and a storm brews. When the rain starts coming down, Lisa's mother tells Buddy that they just can't do have the ceremony outside. [major bummer. It's tough to have rain spoil your wedding day. Having been to a dozen weddings in Florida, it happens a lot!] So, they do it in a beautiful room with a 360-degree view. [I liked how Buddy shuffled his feet a bit while waiting for Lisa to appear, so cute!] Sophia is the Maid of Honor, and the three boys are the Best Men, which is a big switch from the original bridal party - Buddy and Lisa had eighteen bridesmaids and eighteen groomsmen!!