NEW SHOW: Dads

Dads is probably the most protested new show of the season, as from the pilot alone the comedy seems full of stereotypes and inappropriate and ignorant remarks. The opening credits are terrible, but, then again, the premise is not exactly award-winning material. Still, there were a few laughable moments, and there could be more in the future. One nice surprise was Tonita Castro as Eli's maid, as she was a great addition to last season's canceled Go On. However, the main idea driving the show is how Warner and Eli complain about the annoying things that their fathers do to see who is worse on a regular basis... is that enough for a series?

Jennifer Clasen/FOX

Dads "Pilot" (S01E01): Warner comes home from work to find out this his live-in father has destroyed the kitchen by making a sandwich. He is also obsessed with pretending he works with Warner, and even asks Warner's wife, Camilla, to act as his secretary. Warner struggles to confront his father about these things, but soon the problem grows. Child Games, Warner and his friend, Eli's, video game company, wants Chinese investors for a sequel to a game based on killing Hitler in different ways. [I'm rather shocked that this could be a thing.] Things are about to close when Warner's dad shows up and says rude things, weakening the chance of forming a partnership. [I'll say! "Shanghai'd" ?!?] Another coworker is able to get things back on track via blackmail, though Warner's dad does make a big deal out of the "diverse" group, telling his son to "show [Eli's dad] your gay guy." [jaw drop!]

That's right, Eli's dad is also around. He turns up in town for a surprise party, but after an awkward set of exchanges, he pretends to leave town. [his dad DID say terrible things in his toast AND a framed picture of himself was weird.] But, the bank took his condo and he has nowhere to go, forcing Eli to offer his apartment for the time being. [and we have the beginning!]

Go On: Dumping Janie

"Beard-O" and "Loudy." Those are the types of nicknames that the group gives to one another. Makes you wonder how long a first-time viewer will stay tuned in, huh? Similarly, I continue to find it a bit odd how often Ryan "sees" his dead wife, but maybe it was less creepy in this episode because it's told as a flashback rather than have Ryan just see her appear in his everyday life. I think the most problematic thing about this episode (along with it being the funniest, actually), is that the group members actually realized that they are making no progress. Obviously, this has to continue in order for the show to work (although transitioning new members wouldn't be a bad thing, necessarily), but it's depressing to think that you've now watched 22 episodes of a talk show host in group therapy where he's made very little progress in grieving his wife's untimely death. Should this series be granted a second season, what would you change?

Go On "Urn-ed Run" (S01E22): In group, Lauren brings out new props and personalized healing portfolios for everyone, with tasks that include George forgiving his boss and Ryan finally spreading his wife's ashes. [when you're single, you have time to do these things...] See, Ryan has struggled with doing so because he made his wedding to Janie bigger than she wanted, so he wants the disposal of her ashes to be perfect. Ryan dumps the ashes in a lake from a covered bridge, and Steven sings a hymn in an odd manner. [but if it would have made Janie happy...] But, Mr. K. realizes that it was Bisquick, not Janie's actual ashes. [anyone else weirded out by that??]

So, Anne and Mr. K. set out to help Ryan by stealing Janie's ashes and leaving a ransom note. [how peculiar!] Steven and Ryan catch up to them but Anne accidentally puts the urn on the roof of someone's car and that person drives off, busting the vase on the asphalt of a gas station. [I can't imagine how much that must suck!] In thinking back to his wedding, Ryan realizes that he took Janie to the batting cages so she could get out her stress, so he sprinkles the small amount of ashes that remain over the plate. [an odd choice, I thought.] 

Photo by: Justin Lubin/NBC

Everyone begins to realize that they're all still miserable... forcing Lauren to question if she's making any difference at all. Yolanda and Sonia try to help Lauren by faking a "simple but meaty" problem for their leader to fix, so they pretend a coworker has passed away. But, Lauren shows up at the hospital to help the girls' coworkers, so they have to get a bunch of people to act out scenarios for Lauren. But, Sonia blows it as soon as Lauren starts talking. [man... I thought we'd wind up with some great lines from what Yolanda scripted, too!] In the end, however, some of the girls get a little closure... Lauren burns her wedding invitations, Yolanda her wedding dress, and Anne a piece of art that her wife bought. [why not sell the dress and the painting??]

Fun Friday: Betting on Renewals and Cancellations

It can be a depressing time of year for a lot of people. We're only a month out from Network Upfronts Week (May 13-16 this year), and although we've already seen many cancellations and heard about many upcoming new pilots, there are still quite a few shows up for renewal, both freshman and returning. Back in January we did a Midseason Checkup on how the first-season scripted shows were doing so far. But, at that point there were still quite a few that hadn't even debuted, so a lot has changed. (and, actually, there still are some shows that have not seen the light of day yet, like Crossbones, Friend Me, The Goodwin Games, Save Me, Family Tools, and Mistresses.) That said, I wanted to go ahead and start predicting how things will go for freshmen series and the older series that this site follows. Again, this only covers the programming on the big five broadcast networks. If a show isn't on this list and you expected it to be, that's because its fate has already been announced, so check here.  

and, not, I didn't try to make the sections near-even, that's just a coincidence.

I think it'll be renewed:
Beauty and the Beast. While the numbers are decent for a series on the CW, there are many cable series that do better. Still, I think it's good enough for the situation. [update: we were right!]
Chicago Fire. Not the highest numbers, but the series is getting a spin-off, so you'd think they'd keep this around for some early publicity, crossovers, etc. [update: we were right!]
Golden Boy. The numbers are decent, but CBS can afford to be picky, so that might work against this drama. Still, the critics are more favorable than not on it, and although it's not my cup of tea, I could see it getting a second chance. [update: we were wrong!] 
Hannibal. For a series about the famed Dr. Lecter, it did not open well, and the second episode did about the same. It could be advantageous that the series does not plan full seasons but just 13-episode installments, and it's hard to make a judgment call after just two airings, but I think NBC could work with this.
How to Live With Your Parents (for the Rest of Your Life). It could be a good fit for ABC, maybe even joining the TGIF lineup if the network could scare up some more family comedies to throw in there. After two episodes, it's still early, but the numbers are decent, even if it does have Modern Family as a lead-in at the moment. [update: we were wrong!]
Last Man Standing. (listed because it's one of the few non-freshman network series we cover that has not yet been renewed/canceled) The numbers are high enough for a renewal, and although I don't think the stories are going anywhere, I think it's a safe show for ABC's Friday night lineup. [update: we were right!]
Malibu Country. The numbers aren't where they could be, but the stories could go far, plus it pairs well following Last Man Standing. [update: we were wrong!]
The Middle. (listed because it's one of the few non-freshman network series we cover that has not yet been renewed/canceled) The numbers are better than last year's and the storylines could easily keep going, so I don't know why this would get canceled. [update: we were right!]
Nashville. The numbers aren't terrible for a 10pm slot, and it got decent critical praise. [update: we were right!]
The Neighbors. The numbers are on the weaker side and it's not a critical favorite, but it's high-concept and fits into the "family" block on Wednesday nights. [update: we were right!]

I think it'll be canceled:
1600 Penn. The numbers are absolutely abysmal, and the comedy packs in too much drama. [update: we were right!]
The Carrie Diaries. The CW operates by slightly different rules, but this series still has weaker numbers than Emily Owens, MD, and that's already been canceled. [update: we were wrong!]
Deception. The numbers are poor and there are two episodes to air that aren't even scheduled at the moment, which is not a good sign. [update: we were right!]
Go On. The numbers suggest that it just fell too far. Combined with a last-minute timeslot move and the very droll plots, I don't see this going anywhere. [Update: we were right!]
Guys with Kids. The numbers were never great for this one, and it aired against the more-established family comedy block on ABC on Wednesdays. It never even got a full season pickup, so as much as it pains me, I don't think it'll make it. [update: we were right!]
The New Normal. The numbers have been on a downward slope, and I think the stories would be scattered should the series continue. [update: we were right!]
Red Widow. The numbers are dropping, and month-long gap between the last episode and the next won't help anybody. [update: we were right!]
Revolution. The numbers have been falling drastically since the pilot, and it's a bit too high-concept for the show to try and "solve" the problem of the power so soon. [update: we were wrong!]
Vegas. The numbers have been pretty steady, although the move to Friday will keep many guessing as to how the remaining five episodes will do. Still, it's a big-budget show, and although another network might risk another season, CBS may not. [update: we were right!]

what do you think will happen? check out the poll to the right and let us know which series you think will be renewed!

Go On: Hiding from Your Feelings

A joke about the Cathy comic strip?? Love it. It was so out of left field that I wasn't even sure I heard correctly at first! Airing on Thursday nights instead of Tuesdays? Don't love it. I think that the competition is stiffer on Thursdays, though maybe I'm just a tiny demographic that would find conflict in the new time slot. What do you think about the series moving to Thursdays? It doesn't matter all that much in long run, anyway, as the season finale is next week. That's right, we're still only in the first season of this show, which can be a little odd when you think about how much has happened... Ryan tried to return to work after losing his wife but was forced to join a therapy group, and not only is he already set to start dating again but the group leader has gotten engaged and is about to be married... I just feel like a real-life scenario wouldn't have been this rushed... am I wrong?

Go On "Fast Breakup" (S01E21): There's a party for Ryan reaching #1 in the ratings, and he soon develops a rivalry with the basketball mascot for KBAL. [haha, I just got the play on the station's name!]

Justin Lubin/NBC

That night, Ryan thinks Lauren drunk-dialed him, so he goes to tell Lauren that he can't be with her. Turns out, Lauren didn't call, but she really does want to get out of her engagement to Wyatt. [yikes!] Ryan encourages her to be honest ASAP, but she chickens out and tries to make crazy demands so Wyatt would call off the wedding. Instead, he accepts them. [this can't end well...] 

Back at the office, Ryan learns that Carrie was the one who called him, and he uses the mascot costume to avoid talking to her. Lauren tells him that he needs to deal with the situation, but then they decide to swap the tasks of breaking the bad news to those close to them. [loved the themed stripper for Lauren's bachelorette party! but at a restaurant??] Ryan winds up doing the opposite, telling Wyatt that Lauren doesn't want to wait another month but wants to marry immediately, and get right on the baby-making as well. [holy cow! how do you mess up this badly?!?] Wyatt and Lauren wind up calling off everything, but Lauren having relationship issues makes the group trust her less. [I didn't really think about that. odd, as I have done a lot of studies on the effectiveness of rulers who have problematic family lives...]

And, back on Carrie, Lauren did a great job fixing the situation, but Ryan comes clean. Carrie won't date her boss, so she quits, putting the ball in his court. [I was super-surprised by this!]

Go On: Ryan and Anne Make a Play for the Same Woman...

I had forgotten that Courteney Cox was guest-starring in this episode, which led me to say "is that Monica?" as Chandler Ryan spotted her for the first time in the cemetery. Oh, and by the way, I found that to be very odd... I mean, I know that you meet people everywhere you go, but making a play for someone you met at a graveyard is a bit more extraordinary than normal, no? Even more head-tilting, however, is Yolanda walking around on a cruise with a laptop, trying to get Lauren's help to meet men. And, although I half-expected to see Steven hanging around the ship, just trying to get laid, the whole Yolanda storyline felt "wrong" to me. Did you like it? Did you find it funny? Were you disturbed by it? Oh, and on an unrelated note, do you think Sonia's parents being deaf is at all a result from the attention Switched at Birth has been getting? You know, they're making deaf culture cool...

Go On "Matchup Problems" (S01E20): Anne sets up Ryan to meet a grieving widow, Talia, but when he asks her out, he winds up inviting Anne on the date. [haha!] Talia milks the waiter for cheap drinks and free buffalo wings for the three mourners, but what's worse is that she's hitting on both of them, as she isn't sure in whom she's most interested. [...what??] She asks them both out for the following night, and the both go for it, though the waiters are pulling for Ryan. [ha!] He goes home with the woman and soon learns that Anne turned down Talia because she got the crazy vibe from her. [uh oh...] Well, Talia steals a car and runs red lights, ending things as quickly as they began. [oh well!]

Justin Lubin/NBC

Yolanda's parents want to marry her off, so they're making her wear a fitted dress and fake breasts, AND they sent her on an Asian Christian Singles cruise. [apparently "marry me off" is still a term... who knew?] While cruising, she skypes the group's meeting, and Lauren tries to help her, though a guy soon starts hitting on her over the computer. She doesn't realize her flirting is harmful, however, until one guy offers up his genitals on the screen. [and Yolanda was where during this??]

Go On: SITATAWYD

Stay in there and think about what you did! Not gonna lie, I wondered what the acronym stood for from the moment that it was first mentioned, and although I did figure it out seconds before the characters, I wasn't that intrigued. In fact, this might be the only show I watch that has a large ensemble cast that I don't really care about. I tend to love ten different plotlines going on, but with this series it's difficult to get into the various stories... maybe the fact that the bulk of the group is WEIRD affects it just a little too much. And the absence of Carrie has been strange, too. I am a fan of Terrell Owens, but more as an athlete than a secretary. With a few episodes left in the season, I really can't make up my mind on if or how this show should continue - what are your thoughts?

Go On "Go for the Gold Watch" (S02E19): Danny is back on the market but still uses elementary-school flirting techniques, which don't work on Sonia. [hahaha!] Mr. K. has developed a love algorithm that can find perfect matches. Mr. K. thinks that Danny and Sonia would get a 98% using his system. Wyatt and Fausta score a 78%... and Lauren and Wyatt score a 23%. Steven and Lauren get a 99%. [as interesting as these facts are, they're still kinda dull.] Owen has been trying to figure out some info about Mr. K. and worries that Anne will blow his cover, so they work together.

Ryan has been yearning for better ratings and has finally moved up from #3 to #1, so the office throws him a party. [I loved the gatorade being spilled on him!] Then, Steven takes him out for a steak dinner to gloat. Ryan also becomes the newest caricature on the restaurant's walls, but this just causes him to realize that he might not ever be happy. He calls Lauren for help and eats his dinner in the restroom, and she suggests that he try helping others to make himself happier. [this whole thing was really weird for me... I just didn't believe Ryan's character would make those choices.] He signs up to be a Big Brother, but he soon hates the kid with whom he's matched. So, Ryan decides to help Danny get with Sonia. [I loved that he just took the clothes off of other people to dress Danny.] Anne gets Mr. K. to host a party, and she and Owen find a room with a dummy of Mr. Belvedere. See, Mr. K. played Wesley in the pilot. [how do they come up with this stuff??]

Colleen Hayes/NBC

Go On: Ryan Gambles Away Janie

Ryan wearing makeup.Yolanda making mix CDs with a "tragedy" theme. Anne meeting women at a bookstore. Strange events transpiring in this show! Sure, Ryan's upset that he no longer has Simone, but I think the thing that most stood out this episode was the fact that several group members were noticeably absent at various meetings, and I don't know why... George and Owen, plus Lauren at the first! What was up with that? And what was with Mr. K. suggesting a personalized break-up song? What is THAT??!? The more I think about this episode, the more I'm unsure how much of it was any good, aside from betting on what Owen will say and maaaaybe Steven being so serious about Ryan not getting into his old gambling ways again.

Go On "Double Down" (S01E18): Ryan finally got Janie's $25,000 life insurance check and doesn't want to be alone, so he goes with Fausta to play Bingo. But, he doesn't actually play because he gets compulsive about gambling. [...I've never thought about Bingo as gambling! I guess it is, but I think of it more as a game you pay to play, and sometimes there's prizes. LoL.] Then, the group shows up to watch March Madness with Ryan, but he can't help but "make it interesting" with some bets. [no George, Anne, Mr. K. there, either.] Superstition sets in, and soon gambling is interfering with Ryan's work, so Steven starts to intervene, as Ryan promised Janie he wouldn't gamble anymore. [yikes!] But, Ryan goes further, even working on having the group bet on things Owen will say. [I found this to be really funny, actually.] Lauren makes the group stop gambling, but Ryan refuses. Steven takes another step and freezes Ryan's accounts, so he heads to Temecula with the life insurance check. [another city I had never heard of before.] Lauren goes after him, as her father was a gambling addict and she doesn't want Ryan to go spiraling downward. Lauren winds up joining him in poker and beats him, "ruining gambling" for Ryan. Of course, she then has issues with control. [ha!]

Justin Lubin/NBC

Elsewhere, Anne is picked up by the cashier at a bookstore, and the next thing you know, they're kissing in public. Soon, Anne introduces Brittany to the group, but she's too dumb for Anne. Though Anne breaks up with her and then tries to get her back, she winds up picking up another girl at the shop. [whoa.] In the end, Ryan and Anne tie their old wedding bands to balloons and release them. [I thought this was different but I didn't like it... just throwing away money bothers me.] 

Go On: Mr. K. as a Nanny, Ryan Still Misses Janie

The premise of the episode was that Ryan can't give up his wedding ring but still manages to invite Simone to move in with him. I was a little surprised that he is trying so hard to make things work with the girl (whom I'm hoping is leaving soon...), but at least it didn't come together in the end. Also, reunion of Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford! I was so excited to see Danny and Matt back together (Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, people!), although the Hughie character was not exactly amazing. I doubt we'll be seeing Danny/Bradley/Hughie often, as it struck me as a one-time thing. And, speaking of one-time things, I'm a little sad that Mr. K. will not regularly nanny for Anne's children... he was really fun to watch in that care-taking role. 

Go On "Ring and a Miss" (S01E17): First, the fun plot, even if it's without Ryan... Anne's nanny quits so Mr. K. fills in, acting as a male Mary Poppins. [and part Maria from Sound of Music as well.] Anne gets upset that he has such wild activities going on, but in the end the kids are happy... so happy that they was him to comfort them rather than her. Asking his advice, she learns that she must be sillier, and she learns to communicate with the kids. [haha that he leaped off the roof in an attempt to fly with an umbrella.]

Byron Cohen/NBC

Simone and Ryan pretend to act out an Italian love scene by reading a menu. [I thought that this was really fun!] He slips up and calls her "Janie," and then gets his wedding ring caught on the curtain at the restaurant, clearly indicating that he's not actually moving on quite yet. [haha, everyone has meetings without Yolanda to bash her!] Ryan asks the group (minus Lauren and Simone) for advice, and Steven joins in to say that he shouldn't rush things. So, Ryan throws his ring into the backyard, only to run after it, and Simone winds up leaving. Steven takes him out, where he realizes that single life isn't the greatest thing ever, so drives to San Francisco to ask Simone to move in with him. Well, she's with Marco, her former flame, and says that Ryan must want her for her, not to replace Janie. [well put! I couldn't have been so concise!] He comes home to a re-decorated place (thanks to Carrie), but he is alone. Well, not completely alone... apparently he and Janie had a cat that he's just now remembering. [how? cats have come up multiple times this season!]

Go On: Ryan and Lauren as Frasier Crane

Hang on, guys. I think this might be a re-write of old Frasier episodes. Seriously, Frasier totally had issues with KACL wanting him to promote products that he wasn't comfortable supporting AND he temporarily quit over it AND he once went crazy trying to find out why someone in a focus group didn't care for him. These stories all went a little differently, but for the most part nothing really changed. [if you don't know what I'm talking about, all of Frasier is on Netflix, so check out "The Focus Group" (S03E23) and "Sweet Dreams" (S05E24) to see what I mean.] Aside from the recycled gags, there wasn't much substance to this episode. More Simone with a sprinkling of Yolanda and George. Owen, Fausta, Anne, and the others were nearly absent. So, let's get to the recap. But, let's take a moment to laugh at three of the group members as Ryan attempts to meditate. 

Photo by: Vivian Zink/NBC

Go On "Go Deep" (S01E16): Lauren hands out feedback sheets. [there are still people in the group who have done the annual sheet more than once?!? she really is bad. do people really join support groups FOR LIFE??] George orates his (he doesn't have a computer) and hits on Lauren in the process. [haha that everyone is to write it in broken English so Fausta's doesn't stand out.] Lauren gets one bad evaluation and is obsessed with finding out who wrote it, so she agrees to meet Yolanda to discuss who might be disgruntled. [two things. first, if you're that upset, why bother continuing with the group? second, they're going to listen to ALL of the taped sessions??] George decides to help decipher who thinks poorly of Lauren's listening skills, and finds out that Sonia wrote it, but on behalf of Yolanda, who feels that Ryan has hijacked the group. [well, yeah. it certainly seems that way. and I'm an outsider!]

Ryan wants to look smart at work when he shows Simone around. [Believing Terrell Owens was Carrie's temp was hard.] Steven asks Ryan to read ads on the air, but Ryan doesn't want to promote things that aren't in "his brand." Well, when 47-year-old bald men living at home are Ryan's primary audience, the items he's promoting aren't exactly first-class. Ryan decides to quit, but later says that it was just for Simone. However, when Ryan attempts to confront "the big cheese," he learns that Steven has fabricated that persona to deliver bad news to Ryan. [that's cute that he values their friendship that much, though!]

Ryan and Simone go on a retreat where they wear robes and meditate, but he really struggles to quiet his mind. He even runs off to discuss things with various others while Simone (and the drop-in Mr. K.) meditate. He makes a comment about the possibility that he and Simone will be together in two years, and she decides to let out her Boston accent. [not sure how I feel about all of this... as I'm not a Simone fan!]

Go On: GhostJanie has a GhostBoyfriend

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Was it just me or did Ryan call GhostJanie "Lauren" at one point? I was really confused, as was my husband. I'm not sure what was supposed to be going on, but the end results on all accounts were odd. I'm not a huge fan of airing a Valentine's Day episode two weeks early, but at least it led to some laughs. I'm going to ignore that creepy combination image/name of Anne, Fausta, Sonia, and Yolanda, but I cannot ignore the fact that Lauren SO doesn't want to marry Wyatt. You can only put off beginning planning for so long. And, if she really does pick a venue in one night, you know she doesn't really care. Some details can be chosen in a matter of hours (like your invitation. or the font and color for your cocktail napkins) but others require a lot of time, like visiting and comparing multiple venues! And this is coming from somebody who hired a wedding coordinator and had three paid people running the show on the big day! Regardless, I think this Wyatt plot is starting to lead a large part of the series down the wrong track, so hopefully they pull out before it's too late!

Go On "Pass Interference" (S01E15): It's the day after Simone and Ryan were intimate. Lauren tries not to make them feel awkward, but tells Ryan that he could have a problem with the relationship and not be able to talk about it because the woman is in the group. He doesn't think it'll be an issue, but, of course, when he goes to make-out with Simone, he sees Janie. [one of her odder appearances, I think.]

Justin Lubin/NBC

He needs to talk about it so he crashes Lauren's other group, for overeaters. [haha, she's "good with these people."] He decides to take Simone to a hotel, pretending to be Rachel Maddow to get a better room. [is this going to come up often? really??] Janie still appears, and this time she brings her ghost-boyfriend. [how weird is this show gonna get?] Ryan freaks out and leaves while Simone is in the shower. [haha!] At the next group meeting (on Valentine's Day), Simone announces that they're not together anymore. [fine by me!]

The girls want to go dress shopping but Lauren doesn't think she's ready. [I don't think I started shopping for wedding dresses until I was engaged about a year. though, if you don't have a date, how would you know when to start shopping? LoL.] They decide to pick out a dress for her, using Owen as a body-double. [one joke about this was good. four was too much.] Lauren finally admits that wedding details stress her, so the ladies decide to plan a nice Valentine's Day party, divvying up the tasks. They argue heavily about the music, Sonia tries to return the gown, they have balloons instead of flowers, and the girl from the dress shoppe accompanies Owen. The ladies all wear the same dress (like bridesmaids!), and in the end, Lauren accepts the binder. Great timing, as Wyatt has returned a day early from his trip. Lauren's first task? Picking a venue. [smart. we initially set a date first, but when we figured out our preferred venue, had to change the date to accommodate their schedule.]

Go On: Simone Returns to the Group

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

I'll start off by saying that this was not a bad episode. However, I didn't really care for it. The idea of a previous group member making a return because of a second loss was a great idea in theory. The fact that the group loves her and that the newbie (Ryan) does not could have been a great dynamic. I actually really liked how Ryan asked Lauren to kick out Simone because he felt threatened. But, when Ryan and Simone ended up getting together, I drew the line. At first I had hoped that the kiss in the rain would cause him to panic and everything would come to a grinding halt. So, when we later saw them in bed together, I groaned pretty loudly. I'm not a fan of the relationship, however it moves forward, but hopefully this will create some interesting drama in the episodes to come. Regardless, I DID think it was very clever of the writers to have Simone take an interest in Anne, therefore staying with her. Then, after Anne admits that sleeping in her own bed is still too painful so she let her guest use it, having all of the other characters come to Anne's house in support of her worked out great for everyone finding out about Ryan and Simone simultaneously. Of course, maybe not Mr. K (whose first name is apparently Benjamin), but we'll get there...

Go On "Comeback Player of the Year" (S01E14): Simone, a former member (previously losing her dance career to injury), is back in the group (left at the altar), frustrating Lauren, who feels she demands a lot of attention. She brings everyone a scarf except Ryan, whom she gives a watercolor portrait. [whose hobby is doing spur-of-the-moment watercolors? also, I laughed at the idea of Ryan having Usain Bolt's phone number! NBC is just not letting go of those Olympic "Hot Weather Sports" ties.] Ryan wants to talk about how his show has been cut by fifteen minutes, but everyone is more interested in Simone. [what in the world is Anne wearing?!? That's the ugliest dress I've seen in five years!] Mr. K., however, was listening and turns Steven's car upside-down in the parking lot as punishment, then uses gloves to slap him twice. [how do people get cars upside-down without really damaging them??]

Ryan asks Lauren to eradicate Simone, but she won't do anything. So, Ryan tells Simone to hit the road, then tells the group that they need to choose between the two of them. [haha, Mr. K. wants to get rid of Yolanda instead!] Simone talks her way into spending a little time with Ryan, who promptly falls for her. Kissing leads to sex, and the couple is discovered when they go to Anne's to help her get over her lover, who didn't take her heart medication seriously. [you have to wonder why... did she want to die? did it give her bad side effects? and that breastmilk comment was crazy, too!]

Photo by: Justin Lubin/NBC

Danny is getting taken to the cleaners in his divorce, so Anne decides to help him out, bringing up that Danny is 1/64 Chinook, among other things. She soon gets him a fair deal but she struggles to stop there as greed sets in.

Oh, and Terrell Owens, Mr. K., and Steven all turned Ryan's car upside-down, and Ryan takes off after Terrell as if he could catch him.

Midseason Checkup

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

For the past six months, the new series that we've focused on have all been on the "Big 5," better known as the broadcast networks of ABC, FOX, CBS, the CW, and NBC. We looked at each show in four parts, deeming them "good," "bad," "questionable," and "ridiculous." Some of them have not yet started, as the midseason is just getting underway. FOX has The Following premiering tonight, and the ball will just keep rolling from there, with NBC's Do No Harm starting Thursday, January 31st, Body of Proof beginning Tuesday, February 5th on ABC, Zero Hour (also ABC), showing up on Valentine's Day, and more. So, this post will serve as an alphabetical roundup for where this season's shows now are and which are still to come. In the near future we'll do a separate article to look at a few cable shows. 

1600 Penn is three episodes in and definitely NOT a ratings hit. The critics are generally fans, though I've been back-and-forth on it.

666 Park Avenue made it seven episodes before cancellation. All thirteen episodes will air, though the final four won't be until the summer. Beginning at almost 7M, the show lost 3M before cancellation, though it enjoyed audiences in Canada, the UK, Spain, New Zealand, and Australia, where the series will finish in the next couple weeks.

Animal Practice seems to be nothing more than a laugh now. Five episodes aired before it was canceled, one after, and the remaining three went straight to Hulu, hopefully satisfying the fans it did have. I was among the 12,8M who tuned in for the pilot during the Olympics "Hot Weather Sports," but I never bothered again, finding it just too ridiculous. Still, 3.68M stayed with it until the bitter end.

Arrow, a modern retelling of the comic book Green Arrow, has been a hit with critics and audiences alike. The viewership has been steadily over 3M, and the show is about halfway through the first season. I haven't been able to get into it, but I'm happy it's doing well.

Beauty and the Beast has another 13 episodes to go in its rookie season, which has a very stable audience of around 1.5M. I thought that the pilot was better than the marketing, but I still didn't think it was great. Luckily, there are plenty of teenage girls ogling "beast."

Ben and Kate has been a bit weak for its time slot, rarely reaching 3M after the first three episodes. It has seven episodes left in its season to turn things around, but things aren't looking great. Personally, I'm only a fair-weather fan.

The Carrie Diaries just started a week ago, and the pilot drew 1.6M. I think that the CW was expecting more for the Sex and the City prequel, set during Carrie's junior year of high school, but nothing about the series really appeals to me.

Chicago Fire didn't draw my attention because I neither find Chicago nor firefighters intriguing. But, it is certainly drawing plenty of eye otherwise! It started with 6.6M and has seen peaks up to 8.54 recently. I highly doubt that this one will get canceled, so that 10pm Wednesday slot will probably hold this drama for a while. 

Crossbones has been largely forgotten about by many, as no news has really broken in months, aside from the possibility of Hugh Laurie starring. Production has been delayed, and this series will likely not even appear for another year, so don't get excited.

Cult begins Tuesday, February 19th at 9pm. My initial opinions about the series (a blogger investigates mysterious disappearances) remain: boring, but could have an audience.

Deception, initially known as Infamous, has its third episode airing this evening. The first two brought in 5.66M and 4.14M viewers, respectively, but I'm still left wondering how this mystery drama is going to work as anything other than a TV movie in the long run.

Do No Harm has been highly anticipated by many, and the marketing for this updated Dr. Jekyll-and-Mr. Hyde really seems to be creating some hype for its debut on Thursday, January 31st. Personally, I find it to be creepy and an over-exertion of a simple theme. Still, with another former Cosby on the air (Phylicia Rashad), it might just do okay.

Elementary has been a ratings hit for CBS, and will likely continue to grow as it gets the coveted post-Superbowl slot this year. I've personally felt that the episodes are less entertaining as the first season goes on, but I'm clearly in the minority.

Emily Owens, MD is currently burning off the remaining episodes from its original order of thirteen. It's been wavering between one and two million viewers since its inception, but the CW doesn't have the same standards as the others. Its competition? Go On, NCIS: LA, Happy Endings, and New Girl.

Family Tools will be gracing the airwaves on Wednesday, May 1st at 8:30pm. It's only getting ten episodes instead of thirteen, but there are a lot of great actors who could make magic. I'm still looking forward to it!

The Following begins tonight, and I originally found it to be procedural and too crime-solving for me. After the pilot, I was astonished at how much I disliked it, and I'm not sure that Kevin Bacon is enough. That said, my husband liked the beginning of the series and is planning to cover it for TheTalkingBox, so if you think an FBI agent in the midst of serial killers is cool, stay tuned.

Friend Me has been up in the air since the co-creator committed suicide last fall. Unfortunately, the premise might need to change if the series is to continue, as it was to be based on two guys moving to LA to work for Groupon, which has not been doing that great.

Golden Boy begins Tuesday, February 26th at 10pm, though it will actually be a Friday night series for CBS. It's a cop show that originally had Ryan Phillippe attached, though Theo James is the new star. It's a biography to a certain extent, and is set to chronicle the life of a police officer from detective to commissioner. Not my cup of tea.

Go On is in the middle of its first season, and despite some early popularity, it's been below 5M viewers since 2013 began. I don't know if it can pull out of its dip, but many hope so. I'm still watching, but it's not my favorite comedy.

The Goodwin Games is still to come. With no start date in sight, the initial order was cut from thirteen to seven back in early November. The veteran writers and decently-known actors might still draw a crowd when FOX finally decides to air it, so don't panic yet! 

Guys with Kids has been getting a bad reputation since the beginning, with critics mainly complaining that it brings nothing original to the table. Its first season has six episodes left to air, but it has struggled to pull 4M+, succeeding only once since October. I actually think the show is funny and interesting to watch, but I need to start preparing myself for the fact that its renewal is not very likely.

Hannibal does not yet have a date to premiere, but follows the theme of prequels & adaptations, being based on the Hannibal character from the Thomas Harris novels. Not a fan of serial killers or creepiness, I won't be tuning in when it does air.

How to Live with Your Parents for the Rest of Your Life has Brad Garrett playing Sarah Chalke's father, coming Wednesday, April 3rd at 9:30pm. Though the shorter title will certainly help, but Chalke as a divorcee with a close male BFF still isn't going to reel me in to watch.

Last Resort didn't receive a full-season order, and the final episode will air later this week. I thought that the exotic South Pacific was a strange locale for a show that would primarily take place on a submarine, and I guess I'm not the only one. The pilot drew 9.3M pairs of eye but the drama has dipped as low as 4.9M.  

Made in Jersey was an early cancellation, with only two episodes airing before it was pulled from the Friday night schedule. It actually got 7.8M and 6.7M viewers for those episodes, respectively, but it has already burned off the other six episodes that were completed. I hardly had time to really compose a stance on the series before it ended, so no skin off my back. 

Malibu Country did not last long in my book - I gave up after just two episodes. For a Friday night, the numbers aren't terrible... though the TGIF block needs more substance if you ask me.

The Mindy Project received a full-season order after just two episodes aired. Its ratings have since fallen from 3.68M to 2.76M, but it is up against Apt. 23 and NCIS: LA. The critics tend to like the series, though there has been plenty of speculation as to its staying power. Personally, I'm not a fan of Mindy Kaling nor this show's approach to medicine.

Mistresses is expected to begin in May, though it may begin airing in just a couple of weeks in New Zealand. It's a take off of a British series by the same name, and the more I learn about the series, the less interested I am. Still, I might give the pilot a go.

The Mob Doctor was canceled after eight episodes, but many wondered why it took so long. All thirteen episodes did air, albeit the final few often to only just over 2M people (the pilot only drew 5.1M anyway). My gripe with it was that it offered nothing original, and I guess I wasn't alone.

Nashville never interested me because of my dislike in country music. I wondered how it would do in a 10pm slot, but it's been great. Critics like it, the actors have been receiving award nominations, and its only halfway through its season. It has not fallen below 5.9M yet, so it's probably going to stay around a bit.

The Neighbors is halfway is halfway through its first season, staying above 6M in its slot between The Middle and Modern Family. The marketing seems to suggest that critics are coming around to the series, but I recently abandoned it for its failure to incorporate all of the characters and keep a cohesive storyline.

The New Normal has been a bit of a gamble since it was announced, but I like it. I'm not sure if it has a long and prosperous future, and it seems that the general public feels the same: It hasn't hit 5M viewers since the fourth episode, and the latest two have been under 3.5M.

Next Caller is dead in the water. The Dane Cook series never aired, and only four episodes were filmed. I didn't think it had a great premise - two radio hosts having to share the air - but it doesn't matter now.

Partners had a short life. Only six episodes aired, and though it never had more than 6.5M in the live audience, it also never dipped below 5.4M. I liked it but didn't think it was gold. How I Met Your Mother was its lead-in, and it was up against Bones, The Voice, and Dancing with the Stars, so completely different target demos. Oh well!

Red Widow begins Sunday, March 3rd with an eight-episode run. If gangsters are your thing and you want to see how a woman handles things when her mob boss husband dies, check it out. For me, the premise doesn't offer much.

Revolution had me going there for a while. At one point I was curious as to how the airwaves would handle another apocalyptic-like show, similar to both Falling Skies and Terra Nova. After the pilot, I was hooked. I wanted to see where things were going to go. A few episodes later, however, I was more frustrated than anything else. NBC choosing to air ten episodes in the fall and hold the other ten until March has been a choice questioned by many, but the show has never had fewer than 7M viewers, so they must be doing something right!

Save Me is still in the pipeline, with no updates in quite a while. You may recall that this is the show where Anne Heche can channel God. If not, don't worry, as I'm sure Anne Heche will be the big marketing factor when this one returns to light.

Vegas has surprised me. I'm not one for the 1960s mob scene, but it's been great for CBS, starting with nearly 15M viewers and still over 11M after 12/21 episodes. This is certainly an accomplishment, as it's up against Parenthood and Private Practice, among other things.

Zero Hour will first air on Valentine's Day... creepy for a series that is about the paranormal and conspiracy theories. Nobody wants to learn about a spouse abducted on the most romantic day of the day, so although I'm unsure about the debut date, I am sure that I won't be tuning in regardless of when it runs.

Go On: Ryan King Vs. Shaun White

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

First of all, I do not find Rachel McAdams attractive. Therefore, I was pretty left out of the early conversation in the group. Secondly, they need another space in their credits between "as" and the character's name. At first I thought the character's name was "Ashannah." Yeah, my bad. Next, just after Ryan complains about Carrie's "housewives show," he tells her to "go vote." At first, I was wondering if, perhaps, this episode was originally meant to air in November. But, then the New Year's dolls came into play, so I was even more confused. Was it a women's lib comment? I really need an explanation on that one.

Go On  "GOOOOAAAALLLL Doll!" (S01E13): In group, Yolanda passes out Japanese goal dolls, where you write a goal on the bottom and draw on a single eye. The one-eyed doll looks mean until you complete the goal and fill in the other eye. [creepy?] Ryan wants his goal to be going on a first date. [but he seemed overly open about his awkwardness, almost even out-of-character.] Yolanda's goal will be to make a good impression on her new colleagues, ass she's starting at the hospital where Sonia works. Well, her "party girl" facade works well until she's asked to take a drug test. If she passes, it will ruin her reputation. [I kinda wanted to see what the next step was going to be here, LoL.] Several other group members also satisfy their goals within a week or so, and Lauren worries that everyone is putting too much emphasis on the dolls and nothing else. [was that an iCarly reference??]

Ryan picks on Carrie for watching a trashy girly show, then admits that he likes girl stuff but used to blame it on Janie. [LoL.] Carrie and Ryan have girly drinks, watch reality TV while drinking wine, do online makeovers, make bead necklaces, and even play a dance video game. Soon they're watching reality shows in the breakroom while eating salads. [that got intense pretty quickly!] It's not long, however, until Ryan sees an advantage in having Carrie as a BFF. See, her friend, Hannah, visits the station, distracting both Ryan as well as his interviewee of the day, Shaun White. [Shaun White's character, by the way, allegedly has a goal doll for writing a medieval fantasy novel, if you can believe that!]

Photo by: Vivian Zink/NBC

Carrie reluctantly gives Ryan Hannah's number, not thinking her friend would give him a chance. [love how Shaun keeps flipping his hair!] Ryan gets nervous on the date, but she thinks he's cute. Not cute enough to see again, however, and she calls it off via text. [I am so happy texting wasn't a thing when I was dating!] Ryan asks Carrie to be his pity-date to a gala event, but Lauren convinces him to ask Hannah for another chance. He even disrupts Hannah's date with Shaun White to demand a second chance. [haha, "no gold medals and brown hair."] But, Ryan didn't tell Carrie, so she's a bit upset that she got all dressed up and did her hair and whatnot. Ryan doesn't see the big deal but the group makes him apologize. He even gives Carrie some fancy slippers, but she demands he put on a tux to show her a good time, even if they just watch TV and eat cookie dough. [I was disappointed that Carrie didn't at least demand dinner someplace!] To come through for Carrie, Ryan actually has to cancel on Hannah, who wants to sleep together before leaving for Milan in the morning. [not sure I'm happy that he went with Carrie, actually.]

Go On: Ryan is Not Meant for Television

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

What's with the new opening? And more fake bleeping? Why have a character say words that can't actually be said? Not a big fan. Of course, I wasn't hugely interested in this episode, which focused mainly on Ryan's career instead of his personal life and his interactions with the therapy group. Sure, it's great to see Carrie and Steven, but I think that the show is better when the workplace is the background for the group. Am I alone in that?

Go On "Win at All Costas" (S01E12): Bob Costas, Ryan's hero, calls. Ryan goes crazy listening to it, and even has Carrie autotune it for his car stereo. [lmao that Ryan listened to the beginning words a dozen times before getting through the whole message.] After some phone tag, Bob invites Ryan to do a spot on a new TV show. Though he should be thrilled, Ryan worries about a past broadcast experience which led to a viral .gif online of him falling flat. [that's gotta suck. poor Ryan.] At Lauren's suggestion, he decides to repeat his last show first and make amends. [and after he does so, he just walks off??]

Before Ryan is scheduled to do Bob's show, Mr. K becomes a daily part of his life, as his old project, a space arm, is now complete. Mr. K. thinks he should replace Janie, so he cooks for him. [so odd.] But, when he brings Ryan's lunch to Bob's studio, he talks Costas into moving on from sports. [uh oh.]

Photo by: Vivian Zink/NBC

This throws Ryan, as he's not prepared to talk about the Fibonacci sequence, the Supreme Court, and art history. [can't blame him! it was supposed to be a sports show!] In the end, Ryan freezes, blaming Mr. K. The moment becomes another .gif, an though Ryan apologizes to Mr. K., the two have not really fully made up.    

Everyone is invited to Fausta's niece's quincenera except Anne, who is seen as a "wet blanket." [omg that's got to be so horrific!] Because of Owen's advice, Danny shows up dressed as a bullfighter, making things awkward. Anne makes things even worse, however, by showing up and sitting at the table for the deceased. Fortunately, she makes up with Fausta and even changes into a fancy pink dress for part of the evening. [not gonna lie, that's the picture I wanted to share.]

Christmas Episode Round-Up: The New Normal, The Middle, The Neighbors, Guys with Kids, Suburgatory, The Big Bang Theory, Last Man Standing, 2 Broke Girls

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

The networks really seemed to spread out their holiday episodes this year... I think it ended up being a three-week window or something (perhaps even longer if you're a Family Guy fan!), which surprised me a bit. Because of the length, I'll jump right into some overviews and then the recaps with remarks.

The New Normal: Bryan gets Jane a job; Bryan and David realize that they're stressing over the baby.

Go On: Ryan, Anne, and Steven try to miss the group's holiday party, but when Lauren panics over getting engaged, they rush back.

The Middle: Brick is in a Christmas play, Sue bakes cookies, Frankie gets a holiday job, Mike fights with Rusty, and Axl enjoys a bachelor pad in the garage.

The Neighbors: Marty and Debbie decide to go to Hawaii for Christmas, but Larry ruins that idea by opening all of their presents and ruining them.

Guys with Kids: Sheila and Chris pass back and forth her engagement ring. Emily plans a romantic evening for Gary and Marny, who decide to just drink instead.

Suburgatory: Tessa doesn't love spending Christmas with her mom, and Ryan finds out that he's adopted.

The Big Bang Theory:The girls try to get Raj a girlfriend while Sheldon, Leonard, Howard, and Stuart play a holiday version of Dungeons & Dragons.

Last Man Standing: Mike tries to get the girls to all take trips for Christmas to give Vanessa simple holiday, but then has to get them all to stay.

2 Broke Girls: Max and Caroline resort to drastic measure to make rent during the holidays.

The New Normal "Baby Proofing" (S01E11): David is over-eating because of stress, and Bryan is drinking. They confront one another but don't get anywhere. Then they hire a baby-proofer to round corners, add a baby-gate, anchor bookshelves, etc.

Neil Jacobs/NBC

Jane is back and Bryan invites her to accompany him to a Christmas party because David doesn't like them and is busy thinking of everything that could happen to the baby around the house. [people can get crazy.] Jane is afraid that she'll never be accepted and succeed in LA, so Bryan gets her a job interview. [odd little DUI checkpoint where Jane's gun is the problem.] The whole experience convinces Bryan to pour wine down the sink. Jane is told that she's old-fashioned but when she makes it clear that she knows things, she's hired. [guess she's back for the long term. boo.]

Go On "The World Ain't Over 'Til It's Over" (S01E11): [did anyone reference anything other than Jimmy V that week?? and why did they script Anne an f-word if they just bleep it out?] Fausta decorates the group room a little for Christmas but Lauren tells her that everything needs to be non-denominational. [boo.] The group holiday party will be at 8pm on December 21st, 2012, which is when Mr. K. thinks the world will end, thanks to the Mayans. [I'm kinda glad that some show decided to point out that craziness!]

Lauren is afraid that Wyatt may be ready to propose, so when Yolanda and Sonia see Wyatt at a jewelry store, they try to sabotage the proposal (tho they're mostly worried that Lauren won't have time for them anymore if she gets married). He sees right through them and mentions that he's going to pop the question at the party. [groups are not the best idea for this, guys!] Meanwhile, Ryan and Steven decide to go to Napa like old times, and Ryan decides to invite Anne along to take her mind off her graveyard issues (she's been going every single day). They'll miss the end-of-the-world party, but oh well. That is, until Sonia spills the beans to Lauren, who calls Ryan for advice. He reminisces about how Janie told him to get it together or she'd leave him. [that was kinda interesting... I should have expected it but I did not.] They then decide to rush back to LA, but by then Wyatt had already proposed in front of a snow machine, and Lauren accepted. ["Asian glow" is an enzyme thing? and how did they go from Napa to LA in just a few hours??] The episode ends with Ryan turning out the lights to when Mr. K. projected the world to end.]

Vivian Zink/NBC

The Middle "Christmas Help" (S04E09): Reverend TimTom asks Brick to be a wiseman in a play for kids, and Sue will bake the cookies for the concession stand. She calculates that she needs to bake 1200 cookies (20 cast members + 2 parents each + siblings + 1.5 grandparents + crew members + church people + 5% accidental crumblage) and gets to work right away. [this made me laugh SO HARD, guys. how did the Heck family have the money for ingredients to bake 100 dozen cookies?] Brick even gets an extra line to help cover for another wiseman and starts practicing his singing all over the place. Sue has tons of cute Santa cookies but none are selling, so she donates the bulk of them to TimTom's next project. Brick is awkward in the play, not paying attention during his lines and directing others. [but was kinda cute.] 

Frankie and Mike worry that they don't have a way to pay for Christmas presents, even with Frankie not signing her tuition check. [remind anyone of Roseanne?] She decides to get a job at a store to get a 30% discount to buy presents, but the discount doesn't count for 20 days, meaning she can't use it until Christmas Eve. [haha, figures!] She tries to get people to stay away from the items she wants to buy, then just starts hiding them around the store. [let me digress for a second... when we were in middle school, our science teacher would take us to the library for research, but you weren't allowed to check-out any books until the end of the day, because each period deserved to have a chance to access all of the same materials. so, if there was a book you really wanted for your project, you'd hide it within the library, then run there after final bell so you could grab it and check it out and make it to the bus. after a few rounds of this, though, the teacher caught on and we got a big lecture about being unfair to others, LoL!] When she tries to hide a basket of goodies on a tall shelf, someone moves the ladder while she's up there, trapping her for hours. She isn't even able to buy anything before the store closes, so they give the kids pictures of what they're getting and they utilize the post-holiday discount to load-up the next day. [which is a nice way to do things, not gonna lie.]

ABC/MICHAEL ANSELL

A third storyline going on has Mike storing some furniture for Rusty, only to later find out that it may have stolen it from a police officer with whom Rusty plays poker. [episodes with Rusty are extra weird.] After a couple of days, Axl decides to arrange it as a "pad," and even serves dinner and has a Christmas party in the garage. [reminded me a little bit of Greg Brady decorating the attic.] Mike decides that he's "done" with his brother, but TimTom encourages him to pray about it and he does. When everything gets returned, Axl is upset, but Mike realizes that he and Rusty should make up.

The Neighbors "Merry Crap-Mas" (S01E09): Marty and Debbie move wrapped presents to Larry and Jackie's home to keep them hidden. [Max gets an iPad? If Abby is six, he must only be like eight! and, Amber doesn't strike me as the snowboarding type.] When Amber wants her gifts early so that she can leave on a ski trip on Christmas Eve and Max wants to amend his list, Marty and Debbie decide to return the presents and take a trip. [whoa. I don't mind a trip in lieu of presents, but you have to plan that sort of shenanigan in advance!] The kids are unhappy about having been "nice" all year for nothing, but Debbie and Marty still go to book Hawaii. [haha, I loved the kids reacting like that.]

Meanwhile, Larry decides to open the gifts to see what they are, causing the Weavers to have no presents (they're ruined) and no trip (they can't return them for money). Larry then watches Christmas movies, trying to analyze how Santa travels the world in a single evening. [haha on Larry thinking an Etch-a-Sketch has Siri.] Abby tells Larry that Santa will fix things, so he decides to dress as Santa and make Dick his elf. [haha!] They get some strippers to be luau dancers, get a pig for roasting, and scrounge up a few presents for the kids, including an etch-a-sketch for Max. [I particularly liked the carolers!] The Weavers have no presents or tree on Christmas morning, but the Zabvronians are there! [I laughed at an elf/Tiny Tim mash-up.]

ABC/ERIC MCCANDLESS

Guys with Kids "Christmas" (S01E10): Chris and Sheila recap that they got divorced because they had a baby to fix their marriage and it didn't work. [omg that sucks.] Sheila decides to return her engagement ring at this point, but Chris doesn't want to take it, so they pass it through various means until Sheila finally admits to being responsible for their divorce because she didn't try to solve their problems. [did they change the baby who plays Ernie?]

Nick, Emily, and their kids arrive at Gary's dressed in Victorian clothes from taking their Christmas card photo.

Vivian Zink/NBC

Gary and Marny bought a new dishwasher for Christmas, which Emily finds offensive because it's not romantic and she doesn't want them to wind up like her parents. Emily decides to stage an intervention to help them spice-up their marriage, even planning an elaborate date for the couple which includes a carriage ride. They don't love it, though, so they skip to drinking. They head to Nick and Emily's, where Marny takes off her bra and puts it on their Christmas Tree, then she and Gary call the couple "Nemily" because they're too cute. [haha on "Nemily" being expanded to include anything annoying!] They go back to their place to be intimate while Nick and Emily are honest about their own relationship, realizing neither actually likes those annual carriage rides. The next morning, Marny and Gary try to put together the events of the previous night, and Emily and Nick show up to return the couple's four children.

Suburgatory "Krampus" (S02E07): Dalia misses her housekeeper and comes up with a plan to get her back. So, she decides to make a music video about how Carmen used to do all of her laundry to win her back. Of course, she's not having the greatest time working for Noah and Jill anyway, offending the mother by saying she doesn't understand her baby because she never spends time with him. [ouch! it must be extremely taxing on Carly Chaikin to hardly ever smile! Also, Wan'Er in the bridge was random. And, Dalia calling George "Daddy Altman" was odd.] Carmen sees the video and George arranges for Carmen to be in a box for Dalia to open on Christmas morning. [super odd.]

Tessa doesn't like how quick Chatswin converts to Christmas, and even George gives her the early gift of being able to spend time with her mother in Manhattan. Tessa and Alex's first hug is awkward, and Alex can't figure out how to appropriately treat her almost-adult daughter. [whoa to "Krampus is like Santa, but evil."] Tessa decides to leave the hotel in the middle of the night to head home to her dad's.

Someone at the photo shop tells Ryan that he was adopted, freaking him out to the point where he strips in the street and growls at his family's car. [Ryan is SO crazy!] Lisa tells Tessa that she spilled it to the photographer so it's her fault.

ABC/RICHARD CARTWRIGHT

Later, Malik and his family are driving down the road when he sees Ryan running around without a shirt and acting like a wild animal. [what the??] They put him in the trunk and Ryan tells Malik what happened. [Lisa's pajamas were super cute!] Lisa asks Tessa to talk to Ryan about it all, and she shares that your parents are who raised you, and she winds up kissing him. [ahhh! and, Eugene Goldfarb?]

The Big Bang Theory "The Santa Simulation" (S06E11): Leonard wants to spend Saturday night playing Dungeons & Dragons with the guys, and though Penny finds it amusing, Bernadette and Amy aren't thrilled. The three of them parade around in hot dresses to show what the guys are missing, then go out for drinks, inviting Raj when his character dies early. Raj buys the drinks because he likes to pamper ladies so much that he gives his dog foie gras. [seriously??] The girls decide to find him a woman, but it doesn't work out. Plus, Amy gets offended that he once fell for Bernadette and Penny but not her, though they are able to commiserate over how lonely and sad they are. [uh oh. I hope the writers know what they're doing here!]

At the D&D game, meanwhile... Leonard gets Sheldon a scroll (his third favorite method of after stone tablets and skywriting) that features a quest with a holiday theme. Sheldon sings "Good King Wenceslas" to get them through a room, and they later play "Jingle Bells" on handbells. [Sheldon insisting on doing all of the verses was funny.] We learn that Leonard had to leave a research paper for Santa to grade. ["C- was your gift" was harsh!] Plus, Sheldon admits that, when he was five, he went to the mall and told Santa he wants his grandfather back for Christmas. [awww.] So, he decides to let the game's Santa die, causing him a nightmare where Santa sends a canon after him. [kinda crazy, I know.] 

Eddy Chen/Warner Bros.

Last Man Standing "Putting a Hit on Christmas" (S02E07): [odd shot of living room into kitchen. and Vanessa's necklace is ugly.] Mike asks Ed for a an idea for Vanessa for Christmas, so he suggests to steal the dog, let Vanessa freak out, then bring it back and be a hero. [tale as old as time! plus, Go On kinda just did this.] Vanessa admits to Mike that she misses simple Christmases before the kids and grandchild, so he decides to use that charade with his children. Mike gets Kristin to take Boyd to Winnipeg to see his other grandparents, sends Mandy on that Cancun trip, and allows Eve to go with another family so Aspen. Of course, there are problems along the way that he has to solve, like reuniting one of Mandy's friends with her cheating boyfriend and firing Eve from her holiday job as a gift-wrapper at the store. But, Eve figures out what's going on and cuts a deal - no questions about her next report card, as she's getting a D in art. [I hope we focus on that again at some point!]

ABC/CARIN BAER

Mike gives Boyd a snowglobe that plays "Little Drummer Boy," Vanessa's favorite carol. This gets her sad over missing everyone, so Mike makes everyone cancel their plans, reuniting them and looking to be a hero. [Kristin's tickets were refundable and Mandy's are good for a year??] Vanessa even decides to invite Ryan's parents to Denver.

Elsewhere, Ed accidentally shoots a bald eagle and tells Mike and Kyle. Ed and Kyle go to dispose of it, but the bird ends up still being alive. [this was kinda just filler, I feel.]   

2 Broke Girls "And the High Holidays" (S02E12): The girls don't have the money to pay their shoppe's rent, but Caroline doesn't want Andy to know. [typical.] Max has been doing "cupcake runs" at 2am, selling munchies to druggies. [awesome that her dealer tips her off! his name is Kieffer. Teen Mom 2, much? also, um... I don't think that California passed the marijuana bill, so was this taped pre-election and not changed?] Caroline thinks maybe it'll work out because there aren't drugs in the cupcakes, but after she witnesses a meth bust, she changes her mind, worrying that she'll get in trouble just by knowing about someone using. [haha.] Caroline won't ask Andy for money, so the girls try to evade their landlord by going out the bathroom window. Well, it turns out that Max got a big bag of pot from her dealer as a Christmas present, and when it accidentally pours into a pot, she makes drug cupcakes after all. [holy cow!] Caroline continues to be paranoid as Sophie come over and devours some, but then they feed them to their other friends as well, for thanks when they give them the money to make rent. [Oleg ($100), Earl ($50), and Han ($350)]

Darren Michaels/Warner Bros.

Max makes some calls and the girls go to a party to unload the goodies at $15 apiece. But, surprise! Andy shows up at the party to smoke weed, and Caroline goes out the window. [crazy antics!]

Also, we see the girls hosting a children's party where the kids threw frosting everywhere.

Cupcakery Total: $100.00. [finally! back to being poor!]

Go On: Ryan is Ready to Date Again

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

This is not the first time we've seen a "patient" fall for their "doctor," but it's a pretty weak attempt by Ryan to snag Lauren. Though we all know that Wyatt and Lauren are a terrible couple, I can't see Ryan and Lauren being great together, either. Besides, it was kinda expected that he'd eventually make a move on her, and about half-way into the first season is a typical sitcom fit. Moving on... problematically, although this series premiered during the big Summer Sports Extravaganza, it's been quite a while now and the appearance of volleyball superstar Misty May Treanor was probably lost to many viewers. Good try, though! The even larger issue with this episode is that it's already calling back on multiple events that have taken place previously... so is it supposed to be more of a drama? I don't think a first-time viewer would have been too lost, but it certainly didn't seem like an episode that someone could just randomly watch in syndication a few years down the road... right?

Go On "Back, Back, Back... It's Gone!" (S01E10): Ryan decides that he's ready to date again and has Carrie help him get together an online profile together while he tries to meet more women. Misty May Treanor invites Ryan to play volleyball, but instead of charming girls he winds up hurting his back. BUT, the widower card does get him six emails!

Photo by: Trae Patton/NBC

The next day, Ryan decides to go for a kiss with Lauren, but she makes it clear that they are not meant to be. Ryan is paranoid that Wyatt saw him, but after he admits to his sin Wyatt just blames it on Florence Nightingale Syndrome. [we now have the Chubbies and the Saddies. I prefer "Bummer People."] Ryan starts timing when he goes outside to read the paper so he can watch a young girl jog by, and he decides to go after her, though we don't see what happens. [haha, I would totally do that!]

Now, on to the rest of the group. First, Fausta lost the group cat. Sonia and Danny are the only ones who take it seriously, and Sonia goes around "speaking cat" at trees while Fausta finds the feline in her oven. Danny decides to play the hero and discover the "missing" pet. [so a possible inter-group romance? ooookay. the bigger question, however, is HOW DID THE CAT GET IN THE OVEN??] The other group event going on is a party for George, celebrating that he has lived longer than the doctors predicted. Yolanda throws the party but George was hoping for something more "intense," and leaves to seek it out on his own. [haha about everyone talks about how he accidentally dials all of them often.]

Thanksgiving Roundup: The Middle, The Neighbors, Suburgatory, Go On, Ben and Kate, The New Normal, Guys with Kids

by Amy K. Bredemeyer

Happy Thanksgiving! If you're up early watching the parade, cooking, or preparing for football, we thought you'd like a nice run-down of some of this year's new Thanksgiving episodes. You can find several of them online, so if you need a break later on today (and don't want to watch more traditional holiday programming), consider giving some of these a try. First, the nutshell reviews and then the full recaps with remarks. 

The Middle: Everyone loves a great love story, and this episode has Brick enjoying a book about Love Story, Axl starting a new relationship, and Frankie's parents re-living their first date.

The Neighbors: The Weavers deal with having the Bird-Kersees over for the holiday while entertaining Marty's parents as well. In addition, Larry has to come to terms with Jackie's rebellious sisters.

Suburgatory: Tessa heads to Manhattan to see her mother and grandmother for the holiday, but her mother is nowhere to be found. When she returns home to a motley crew of recurring characters in her home, she is greeted by her long-lost mother as well.

Go On: The group decides to have Thanksgiving together, and Ryan decides to host it at the radio station because a) he's working and b) he wants to keep Steven from moving in on a potential love interest.

Ben and Kate: The night before Thanksgiving is a high school reunion for multiple grade levels, allowing Ben and Tommy to be cool kids once more while Kate (who is now on boyfriend-girlfriend level with Will) struggles to confront a bully.

The New Normal: David, Bryan, Goldie, and Rocky all have painful past experiences with Thanksgiving but decide to invite their families to celebrate together for the future of the baby. Things don't go as planned and each guest is booted from the event anyway.

Guys with Kids: Sheila wants to host for Chris and all of his friends' families while Gary is obsessed with purchasing a TV on Black Friday.

The Middle "Thanksgiving IV" (S04E08): [I thought it was funny that Frankie won't pay ten cents per bag at the grocery store so she carries everything herself.] Axl continues to flirt with his tutor, Cassidy. His foot also healed two weeks quicker than expected, so he's excited to get back on the field for the big game. But, his tutor says that football is a waste, causing Axl to wonder what he's doing. He decides to not let fear get in his way and he confesses to Cassidy that he likes her, inviting her to watch him play. [interesting... is Axl maturing?] But, her boyfriend is coming into town so she can't. He tries to cover by acting like he's inviting everyone to the game. [this reminded me of the first time my now-husband ever called me...] Meanwhile, the mascot head has been stolen by a rival school and Sue recruits Brad to help her get it back. Brad tries to have a "dance fight" but he gets beat up. [yep!] Sue tries to make a head on her own, but when that doesn't work she winds up wearing a bear head to the game. [I found it odd that nobody else really got involved with this plotline.] Axl overthinks playing and fumbles three times, so Sue gives him a pep-talk and he gets it together. [and we're supposed to believe that he listens to her now? wow, maybe he IS growing up!] Things end well for him as a scout reminds him that East Indiana really wants him AND Cassidy kisses him, telling her she broke up with her boyfriend. 

ABC/MICHAEL ANSELL

Now, the dinner-part of Thanksgiving... Frankie wants to host a couple of marines and is incredibly awkward about it, even saying the Pledge of Allegiance before Thanksgiving dinner. [ha!] Her parents make things worse when her father keeps droning on about nutrition (he lost four pounds recently). Things go so haywire at dinner that the Marines leave before dessert! 

The Neighbors "Thanksgiving is for the Bird-Kersees" (S01E08): [loved the early Marty line: "What could be more American than eating food to make room for more food?"] Jackie is profoundly depressed because she misses her sisters, who were exiled ten years ago for trying to overthrow Larry. [what was up with that crop-circle-like design??] Dick and Reggie decide to go visit the prisoners and invite them to Thanksgiving. Against his better judgment and sense of self-preservation, Larry does decide to let them be free once again. [though I hope that they're not going to be regulars!]

Marty is excited about Thanksgiving because he thinks he'll be able to impress his parents for once, but Debbie is stressed because she always gets criticized over her cooking. Marty suggests that they un-invite his parents and do things their way, and he makes up a lie about how the oven is broken. [...really?] But, as his parents begin to think that his new house is too small, he decides to let them come to show that he's doing well. [I'm surprised that Debbie isn't more upset about Marty's cowardice there!] But, they'll still be doing a deep-fried turkey. When the duo arrive, Marty's father doesn't even want a tour of the house while his mother gives the children hand-knit sweaters. [yeesh!] After Marty's mother starts in on everything about Debbie, her house, and her children, she stands up for herself and Marty defends her as well, sending his mother to sulk in the car. Dick decides to help by talking to Marty's mother about "changing the game" and not forcing mothers-in-law to keep their daughters-in-law "on their toes." [odd coming from Dick.] When she comes in, she actually compliments Debbie on her turkey, though everyone else dislikes it. 

ABC/PETER "HOPPER" STONE

Suburgatory "The Wishbone" (S02E05): Tessa wants to spend Thanksgiving with her mother in Manhattan. But, George plans to go to Dallas's for Thanksgiving this year, though without costumes. Dalia wants a Caribbean theme, but after Dallas finds out that Tessa won't be there, she decides to fire the chef and cook herself to "rally around" George. [um, I smell disaster!] But, George tries to cook and ruins potatoes trying not to have to pay "guest Alan" for advice. [I did think that $8 was a bit steep for a small pinch of advice! and, Carmen took the baby to see a witch doctor??]

Over at Lisa's, she's freaking out over how close Malik is getting to the family when Sheila invites him for Thanksgiving. Malik played touch-football with his family so he takes a shower when he gets there, but Sheila winds up seeing him naked, distressing Lisa more. 

ABC/ADAM TAYLOR

In Manhattan, Alex, Tessa's mother, is a no-show. She was supposed to bring the main course, so Tessa leaves early. When she gets home, Alex is there, initially thinking that Dalia is Tessa. [ha!] George is pretty upset that Alex didn't do what she was supposed to, but after some initial shock, Tessa and Alex talk. [the fake-snoring thing was awkward.]

Go On "Dinner Takes All" (S01E09): The group decides to have Thanksgiving together. ["Peter? sweetie, that's low self-esteem!" was hilarious! and cute The Brady Bunch moment with the heads!] Amy, a girl Ryan and Steven knew in college, is in town for a job interview and is staying with Ryan. [can we keep Lauren Graham, please? love her!] Amy and Ryan try to joke with Steven about how he doesn't know sports. But, Steven and Ryan both have feelings for her, and because of a broken fold-out couch, they share Ryan's bed, which makes him uncomfortable. [I bet!] So, when Steven announces that he's going to take Amy to Santa Barbara for Thanksgiving, Ryan decides that he should host Thanksgiving at the office and make his assistant do the cooking. [I thought that was rude, even for him!]

Ryan orders the group to create a de-sexualized atmosphere, but things get awkward quickly when Lauren offends Owen's mother and several of the others start bothering Amy. [Ann's two adopted children adoring Ryan wasn't as funny as I think it should have been.] Ryan decides to confront Steven, asking him to step aside because he might want to make a move in the future. So, they go to a bar and play an old game of see-how-many-sips-of-other-people's-drinks-you-can-take-before-getting-punched. [seriously? has anyone heard of anything like this before?] Ryan wins, almost breaking the ten-drink barrier. Ryan admits to Amy what's going on, and she tells him he has no chance with her right now - she won't be the first one after Janie, though she's always had feelings for him. [meh. I thought that was a weak way to end it... some far-off-future nonsense?]

(Photo by: Colleen Hayes/NBC)

Ben and Kate "Reunion" (S01E07): Ben and Tommy rescue a live turkey from the mall (people were bidding on it to eat for Thanksgiving) and Kate decides to let them keep it, though they later drop it off at a preserve.

Kate and Ben's high school reunion is the night before Thanksgiving, and Kate isn't looking forward to it because there was a girl who made her life miserable. [such an informal reunion! and I'll never understand how the multiple-grades thing plays on TV, with the exception of teeny schools like on Wings.] Will decides to go and help Kate "slay the dragon." [Kate AND Ben played Jesus Christ in Jesus Christ Superstar? how often did their school do that musical??] It's been eight years and Kate isn't thrilled with where she is in life, so she's not thrilled when the mean girl plays innocent.

Cr: Jennifer Clasen/FOX

Will tries to get the girls to do a sing-off, but Kate doesn't think she needs to prove anything. [um, okay?] She decides to brag about her awesome boyfriend, and that's the end of it. Plus, Tommy wants to make an entrance at the reunion, and resorts to asking Maddie for ideas. [not sure why this happened.] She suggests that he "lose the fro." Luckily, he doesn't go through with it.

Perhaps the bigger story, however, is that Ben and BJ got married seven years ago and kate doesn't know. Ben wants to tell because mail is coming to her house addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. Ben Fox," but BJ thinks that the appropriate window has passed and they should just keep it a secret forever. Well, BJ decides to break the news during Kate's Thanksgiving toast... being even more honest than Ben expected. He thought it was a green-card-marriage when really BJ has dual citizenship but made Ben marry her so that he'd be around if Kate needed him, as he was going to head to Indonesia right when Kate became  pregnant. [I understand how this is supposed to be sweet, but it's a bit too odd.] 

The New Normal "Pardon Me" (S01E09): Goldie, Rocky, and the guys dish about how they don't like their family Thanksgivings so they decide to start their own traditions. [haha, Rocky wants to charge for the time spent having Thanksgiving with them!] Bryan and Shania go to get a turkey but didn't know that they'd have to choose a live one and kill it themselves, so they buy them all to liberate them, keeping them as pets. [what kind of theme is this??] After David's mother gives him a guilt trip, Shania suggests that everyone bury the hatchets and invite their families, including Goldie's grandmother, Shania's dad, Rocky's half-brother, and David's parents. [nobody for Bryan? I laughed at Jane as "the last real American, along with Newt Gingrich."] David's parents get through a fight and then get wild with one another. Then, Clay goes to hit Rocky's brother when he realizes that the guy has had a relationship going with Goldie for some time now.

(Photo by: Trae Patton/NBC)

Plus, Jane flips at the idea of a meatless Thanksgiving (they're having tofurkey at Shania's request) and goes hunting the backyard turkeys with a cleaver. [seriously??] All of the extra folks get kicked out, the tofurkey is terrible, and the core group orders pizza, deciding that they'll deal with families on Christmas but keep Thanksgiving sane in the future.  

Guys with Kids "Thanksgiving" (S01E09): Gary has decided that six months is too long to go without a television, so he plans to spend three days in line to get a Black Friday ultra-deal: a $4,000 television for $100. [say WHAT?? also, my brother will be spending the holiday in a similar situation, so I don't fault people who choose to do so.] Marny isn't upset that he could miss Thanksgiving with the family because she thinks he'll quickly wimp out. He starts out as the second person in line, but nobody will huddle with him and he gets upset. Marny tries to reason with him after one night on the street, but no dice. By Thursday, Gary has made peace with the cold by swapping spots with someone to be on top of a heating event - still keeping him sixth in line. Still, there's some fierce competition. 

Photo by: NBC

It's Ernie's first Thanksgiving so Sheila and Chris decide to celebrate together, at her place. [um, his birthday has already happened, so how is this his first one? perhaps he was in the NICU or something and didn't celebrate out of the hospital? or maybe the episodes were meant to be aired in a different order?] To make things less awkward, Chris invites Gary, Nick, and their families, having to cash-in a favor to get Nick and Emily to change their plans. Sheila wants to make a big fuss and theme everything, choosing to go for "historically accurate," complete with a boiled cod instead of turkey, no alcohol, no Oreo pie, and maple sap-soaked hickory nuts. [wow. that's worse than the Pilgrim-inspired meal on Everybody Loves Raymond! and what was Emily's outfit??] Yoda and Clark give the adults advice on how to get rid of the host's food and eat something else, but Sheila catches them snacking on stuffing in Emily's bag. [I didn't understand why the adults couldn't come up with a plan themselves... hiding food isn't new!!] Sheila freaks out and throws everything from the table out the window before she realizes that this group is so casual that she doesn't need to impress them. [her insults during this process were pretty intense.] Marny decides that they should all join Gary, and Sheila brings Subway sandwiches for everyone. [seriously, she wants them to pay her back??] When the doors open, Gary sicks his older kids on slowing down others, allowing him to actually get the big-screen!